How Blake Williams, Former Teen Heartthrob, Bounced Back From The Brink


The boyband star is back and he's ready to live his best life as unapologetic and fearless as possible.

New York City - Blake Williams is in high spirits and loud shirts as he spends an entire day posing for a photoshoot in various locations within a mere two block radius.

The dark haired and tattooed former teenage heartthrob was mid-shoot in an abandoned dance studio when I first met him, striking various moody poses underneath the large and slightly dangerous looking skylight. His quiffed black hair similar to that of a 50s greaser, the natural strong and silent smoulder and his striking body art are cut with a gleaming, pearly white smile every so often for a shot, given a glimpse of his newfound happiness in 2018. For gruelling hours, he lay, sat and crouched in similar poses in an array of outfits that were far more flattering than the ones he donned during his time as part of The Zone.

The last session before a well earned dinner break had Williams outfitted in a wild red shirt adorned with orange spirals and large white birds in flight, black ripped jeans which seem to be a new staple in his wardrobe and he was bravely barefoot on the cold slab of a floor. Blake sat in numerous prayer-like positions with mournful and lost expressions. Blake, however, was totally in his element and - dare I say? - elated throughout. This may come as a shock to those who have followed Williams over the last four or so years as his tumultuous personal life has been well documented. Many fans and former colleagues have been wondering, "Is Blake OK?". I also asked myself this question before finally meeting the man himself.

While Blake is only just starting out as a pop music entity in his own right, he is still a known name in many households around the globe especially in those who had teenage girls growing up in the early 2010s. His career isn't exactly illustrious but by modern pop culture standards, he certainly has a few notches to his belt. Blake was 1/4th of the highly popular boyband The Zone when the crooning teenage boys trend was at its most lethal, lead by music giants Weekend. Speaking of said band, Williams dated Dustyn Blue for the best part of 2 years and that relationship was the gift that kept on giving to the sleazy tabloids of the time due to the "shock" of Blue coming out, the idea of members from two rival bands falling in love and, of course, the infamous cocaine ordeal. If his brushes with stardom wasn't enough, Blake is also the older cousin of pop sweetheart Mandy Williams, who also debuted during the same era. Then Williams pretty much all but vanished.

The Zone ended. There were rumblings and flutters about a solo Blake album here and there but they would die down. Blake's personal and professional relationship with Blue broke down, a catalyst in his departure from Five Pesky Kids Records. Talks of Celebrity Big Brother would circulate from time to time but nothing came to fruition. His social media profiles lay dormant from the best part of late 2014 to 2016. Blake was doing the unthinkable in pop music terms: taking time away after only one album - and said album was also shared with three other members. It became clear that Blake was no longer an active musician.

It shouldn't have come as much of a surprise given the state of his mental health at the time. While his former lover managed to clean his act up and stay afloat, Williams did not suffer the same fate and unfortunately fell deeper into the pit. With demons to battle, a backlash from Weekend fans against him as well as angry and confused The Zone supporters on top of the fact that he had just parted ways from a major record label, there was no way a big scale solo pop career was viable. Not even his former bandmates were throwing him a bone.

Now, six years after making his first dent on the charts, a highly publicised relationship meltdown, two years worth of therapy sessions, the loss of once impenetrable friendships and a total revamping of the entire music industry, a brand new Blake - now known mononymously - is ready to take on the world.

"I fell into a depression and I didn't realise it. I just thought I was tired out from the implosion of everything. I wasn't motivated at all and then I started to notice, long after it had begun, just how much time I was spending in bed and indoors. Because I felt safe and relaxed while doing it, I didn't register it as a bad thing. To me, I was just winding down and staying away from toxic situations but laying in bed all day, pretty much everyday is far from healthy either. At one point, getting up to make some coffee was the highlight, the biggest achievement and most strenuous thing of the day. I had severed ties with everyone and I mean everyone. Friends, family, industry connections - nobody wanted to know me and I certainly didn't want to know them at the time. I had no lifeline. I had no words of encouragement. It was a long, painful process but I slowly started to reclaim my life. I made an appointment with my doctor. I reached out to a therapist. I cried many tears; a mixture of sorrow, pain, relief, happiness and sometimes I had no fucking idea what they were for but I let it all out. I let go and got there in the end. I had so much unresolved conflict that I just couldn't function. I couldn't make the next move. I shut down and shut off. That's what I learned and that's when I decided to face shit and take responsibility rather than suppress and point the finger. That's why I started to write a confessional album."

Blake started to confess everything over breakfast the next day, seeming very candid and content with discussing not only his past but the details of mental health struggles. While his new image may seem rather angsty and ballsy, Williams surprisingly has a sunnier disposition in person. He hadn't even touched his black coffee yet so it wasn't caffeine fuelling him that early in the morning. Blake is in a much more positive mindset. When he discussed his ordeal with depression lead by the pressures of being in the public eye, I was curious as to why he entered the industry in the first place. Was it accidental? Was he totally naive? Did he go into it wanting all the glitz and the glamour before realising he had bitten off more than he can chew?

"I knew I was going to get attention but it was out of my control. I didn't go looking for it. I was dating Dustyn Blue when Weekend were in their debut era and he had just come out...that was massive. My cousin is also Mandy Williams. Take that and add it to the fact I was forming my own band, the spotlight was on me before I even sang a note! The fame is a great way for your music and words to reach lots of people and yeah it has some perks like getting to meet your idols, a lot of free stuff and getting to see the world but it's not the be all and end all. The schedule is crazy, the pressure is immense, you're literally exhausted, the press are invasive. The novelty wears thin pretty quickly. I don't want to return to that. I'm grateful for all I experienced and achieved as part of The Zone. Memories to last a lifetime. I just don't want to be doing that shit for the rest of my life."



Without any prompting and before even finishing the first of his two breakfast croissants, Blake revealed even more about the catalysts of his battle with depression and addiction. "I think I've always been looking for safety and approval. I never really got that and when I did, it didn't last long and I would then point the finger and be mad at the world. Everyone is entitled to love but I grew up feeling ENTITLED. A totally different level. My parents divorced when I was like...4 or 5. I'd see kids in movies and at school with loving families and I felt like I was denied that. Same with grown relationships, I just couldn't seem to have a stable one. Also, in the band I felt like other members were getting more vocal spots and I really just developed this victim complex. Yeah I went through shitty things but I overreacted and fell way too deep into my feelings. I learned the hard way that the world doesn't revolve around me. We all deserve happiness but we should also realise that not everything will fall into our laps. We have to strive, work and take ownership." While Blake was opening up old wounds from his past, he wasn't wallowing over it in self pity in the middle of this Parisian style cafe. There was an air of confidence and ownership about his verbal delivery. At times it almost sounded as if he was holding back laughter, totally detached from the person he once was. While it was wonderful to hear and see Blake 2.0 in the flesh, it really brought home the fact that these pop idols are humans too. We tend to forget this and, learning more about his train of thought and emotional state all those years ago, I understand why he dropped the American Dream and focused on his mental health. Not everyone is willing to make such a sacrifice in the industry.

Blake was pretty much an open book, somewhat of a relief to me as I had reservations about many of my questions before meeting him properly. While getting the scoop is every journalists dream, I had to take into account that I was dealing with a man who pretty much just got his life back on track. I did not want to pour salt into wounds and trigger him after all that he had endured. Thankfully he has already name-checked Dustyn, Mandy and his former band The Zone, so I took that as a green light. Many stars who have gone solo or been in high profile relationships wince, anger or walk out at the mention of former associates but Blake managed to say names without batting an eyelid. I took this opportunity to ask him about The Zone - his former band which comprised of him, Chris Adams, Jason Ochoa-Steele and Liam Allen. They were quite the mystery - having success from the jump, actually managing to release an album unlike some other pop group counterparts at the time, suddenly becoming a trio, reports of deadly infighting and then just suddenly splitting and not talking to one another without any real explanation. This was all in the space of the two years in which they were active.

"I think we definitely had a good run at it." Blake started, all wide eyed before recoiling as the words and memories flowed. "I don't think we were destined to be huge or have much longevity merely because of the time we debuted. Weekend were eating up all the competition. They're still huge but at the time of their debut, they were a phenomenon. The amount of boybands who fizzled out as quickly as they arrived was insane. We were lucky enough to actually get an album out but the comparisons and pressures were always there, especially through my association with a member of the band. We did manage to garner a very loyal fanbase though and they're still supportive of all four of us to this day."

The group certainly had a flying start and as Blake eluded to, they were still destined to fail with Weekend as their main competitor. Harsh rivalry was not the only reason the four-piece flatlined after a mere two years together. On top of Blake's growing addiction at the time, the group's other members were also facing their own challenges and new chapters. Chris Adams was to be a father before an unfortunate miscarriage, Liam Allen was loved up with Ellie-Grace Summers and also had ambitions of a solo record while Jason Ochoa was busy planning his wedding with fellow pop star Kourtney. The brand of The Zone itself was also in jeopardy with Weekend at the helm. Yes, in late 2013, not long after Blue and Williams split, Weekend's record label Five Pesky Kids bought out Kiss My Pop Records, the label which Blake and the boys were signed to. I was curious as to what Williams viewed as the final straw for The Zone. "Chris dropped out of the band and he was our main songwriter as well as a prominent vocalist. We were all either going through personal demons or distractions outside of the group. There was "the tricky second album" pressure too. The writing was on the wall for a long time. Tensions were high and when we finally released out first song as a trio, it didn't do well and the label NEEDED it to do well. I think the three of us were relieved it bombed. Gave us an excuse to throw in the towel. There was no love lost when we terminated our contracts and walked out."



With the general public no longer showing interest in the group as a trio, their difficult second album being shelved after all the drama they endured to record it on top of everything else going on in their personal lives, it was easy for me to understand why they were tired of it all. Blake was honest enough to admit that there was "no love lost" among the former members after the split which seemed rather harsh given all they endured together. The band have not been an active unit for four, almost five years now. I was curious as to where everyone stood now that we were approaching half a decade since the drama. "We don't talk, really. It's beyond the stage of animosity and bad blood. We're over that. There was a period where things were grating and tense but we've let go of that. We're not friends either. It's more like a...mutual understanding and agreement to be bigger people. I can't remember the last time I saw or spoke to one of the guys. I'm sure it'll be fine if we met each other at an event or something like that but it'd be a fleeting conversation at best. We're all on different wavelengths now...which is cool, really."

While I don't doubt Williams' honesty, I couldn't help but feel like his views were simply just that: his. I am not totally convinced that his former band members are on the same page. There was an awkwardness to his answer - a lack of eye contact and the swirling of his near empty coffee cup. My suspicions are more or less confirmed when I bring up the idea of a reunion. Blake swiftly shakes his head and resumes eye contact. "Probably not, no. I never say never though. I thought I was done with the industry completely and now look. At this moment in time however, I don't see it. If we were to do it, we'd all have to be on the same page and really iron out all our differences. We tolerant each other right now but I know there's a lot of stuff that still has to be said, faced and dealt with if a real reunion were to ever happen. Also, we haven't been gone that long. Maybe after 10 years when a nostalgia factor kicks in. Maybe." The last "maybe" sealed it for me. It's not happening any time soon.

With his first musical foray out of the way, I felt as if I could finally be respectful and focus on the man himself. With his industry ties, however, it became hard not to name-drop and tread over the same territory. After The Zone split, he stayed with Five Pesky Kids as a solo artist and to talk about his decision to leave and go independent, I had to bring up the memory of working under his ex-boyfriend. I apologised and Blake just laughed and shook his head. "I couldn't really hand in a record about one of my bosses to him and his best friends now, could I? In all seriousness though, I was just lost both in the big machine and in life. I was raw about the breakup, the demise of the band, I was an addict and not to mention enduring the struggles of an identity crisis both as a person and as a recording artist simultaneously. I would have really tipped over the edge had I stayed with a major label. I needed to work on my own time and terms. I had no idea how to do it but I knew I had to, so I left." Blake is proud to be an independent artist now and it was wonderful to see him grinning ear to ear while talking about it after learning of his previous situation signed to a major.

Blake has jokingly admitted to using his ex as one of his muses for the upcoming album, Rewrite, but like many pop albums, it wasn't perfect on the first try. After being educated on all of his different mindsets, issues and label situations over the years, I was intrigued about how past incarnations of the album sounded and how he got to the record that "changed his life". "I have like maybe three incarnations of my debut album and they're all completely different." Blake admits before relentlessly bashing his first attempts at a solo record. "The first was generic as fuck, recorded on autopilot and I don't think I had written any of them. The second was a mess. That was towards the end of my time at Pesky when the identity crisis was at its peak. I really had to go through the motions and live it all in order to get to Rewrite. It's a very honest record and I had to face a few home truths and be OK with reflecting on my past and accepting responsibility for shit in order to make such an album. For a long time I'd run and hide but that got me nowhere. I truly had to dance with the devil in order to be free. That's what Rewrite is. It's like that anger fuelled letter that you scribble out to vent and then burn it, symbolically letting it go and moving on to a new chapter." This certainly does sound like more than just an album for Blake. It's a much needed release and cleanse.



After hearing what inspired the honest, tell-all factor of Rewrite I was intrigued as to what influenced the sonic landscape of the record which has a very laid back, slightly urban yet slightly tropical pop sound. Very subdued. A reason my curiosity piqued was the man himself. He's a bit of an oddity. He was in a pop/R&B boy band then went indie and sometimes dresses like an Erich Hess tribute act with his hair and leather jackets and the next he's channelling Tumblr hipster chic with his geeky-yet-fashionable attire. What does he listen to? Who are his influences? "I like a lot of rap music, a lot of trap and urban radio hits but obviously I'm not a rapper and I'd never try to be. I do love a lot of the beats and the writing really inspires me. Of course you have your novelty and outrageous tracks but rappers, in general, talk about real shit and that's what I wanted. I didn't want to write lyrics just because they rhyme and will get me heavy airplay. I wrote exactly what I wanted and I didn't care if it was a tad explicit, not easy on the ears or even if it sounded silly. I wrote from the heart and said exactly what I wanted to say, word for word. I'm a huge fan of artists like Coke and Joshua Grimmie. They have a very confessional, "this is how it is" style of writing. As for production, I have a very light and smooth voice and I wanted a sound that would compliment that as well as stay true to my love of urban sounds and my brief foray into pop. Rewrite, I think, marries it all perfectly." His answer with rap music surprised me at first but as he continued to explain why he loves the genre, all while playing with the crumbs on his plate, it all clicked. Hearing Williams' music, he is brutally honest and lays it out on the line regardless of how it paints him. It should come as no surprise that a lot of forthright rappers inspire him as well as the likes of Joshua Grimmie.

Learning that he like his music to be more explicit and less commercial, I began to wonder if he also felt stifled within the band. We have spoken on personal struggles and tension with other members but didn't really get a chance to touch on the brand itself. Sharing the limelight with three other people cannot be easy and when your tastes are completely different to what you're told to release, it must feel rather restraining. "The music we made for The Zone was not something I'd personally listen to or create myself. I still enjoyed it and I don't think any of it is bad, per say. It's just not my first choice. We were writing and recording with an agenda. We wanted fun pop songs and just to be an escape for our fans. We also had a label and A&R heavily involved too. Chris was also the designated songwriter. The entire project was not a great creative outlet for me but it was still great fun, I enjoyed performing and I learned a lot." He smiled warmly. By this time, Blake was on a refill of his coffee and seemed to be no longer on tenterhooks while discussing his old band and his situation.

Taking an entirely different direction from the music that catapulted one to fame is one thing but to come back after four years of silence and do it all independently is another. When I tweeted that I would be interviewing Blake, a barrage of trolls replied with the word "flop" and were quick to tell me that his pre-order sales weren't looking great. Blake on the other hand couldn't care less. "I feel like the entire music industry has changed and not just the scale in which success is measured. Streaming is really the driving force of it all, records aren't selling as much yet nostalgic formats like vinyl and cassettes are in high demand meanwhile the charts are all at a bit of a standstill. It's a very awkward time in music. Nobody knows how to market it and there's no clear direction on the fate of this industry. It's all about leaps of faith right now. For me, success is just getting this album out. I'm an independent queer artist who used to be in a boyband that released a grand total of one album like...half a decade ago. I don't expect to be #1 or sell 200k in my opening week. I'm happy with the record and that's that. Anything else is just a bonus." Blake seems content with his work and proceeded to show me a digital mock-up of his album on vinyl, which he is excited to own.

The album, Rewrite, is the cause of controversy and it hasn't even hit shelves yet. It's lead single "Who Do You Love Now?" garnered a lot of attention for its focus on his relationship with beloved Irish pop star Dustyn Blue. Pre-order tracks also follow suit. For someone who wanted to break away from negative situations, he is releasing rather provocative music but he appears to be at peace with the backlash this time around and immediately shakes it off as soon as I ask him if he finds it difficult to write and release such personal songs. "No. Not hard to write at all. In a sense it wasn't pleasant having to go through the memories at first but I knew that's what I wanted to write about. The more I reflected, the easier it became and I'm totally over it all despite what some people think. I am aware that my ex has loyal fans who already hate me as it is. I knew bringing our relationship up was going to hit a nerve but, and not to sound provocative, I really don't give a shit. Fans can squabble all they want but at the end of the day, this album is my truth and it has been more than therapeutic working on it. Me being happy with myself, my situation and my past totally trumps faceless Twitter profiles, who have never even met my ex or myself, calling me a dick or whatever."

While I have no real qualms or strong opinions on the Blue vs Williams debacle, I find myself nodding along and agreeing with Blake and his determination to live out his truth. Blake himself seems to be over the entire situation and is just expressing and explaining it in his music, which is like a journal. "If I didn't express and accept then I'd still be the same person." Blake begins to clear the air on the controversy surrounding the record. He leans in with honest, puppy dog chocolate eyes as he defends his beloved project from the naysayers. "A lot of people are pissed, thinking it's a personal attack and that I'm bitter but they haven't heard the full album yet. Even when it does drop, I know a lot of folk will just hear what they want to anyway. It's a journey from start to finish and it truly goes through it all: being in love, falling out of love, hating my ex, blaming my ex, hating myself, blaming myself, being hung up on shit, letting go of it all. It's a story - MY story and I have every right to tell it."



For the most part of this interview I had picked up on the fact that Williams very rarely says Blue's name and refers to him rather as "my ex". After a refill on my peach tea, I politely questioned why he refrains from saying his name despite releasing an album that pretty much documents the journey he had with said pop star. "Yeah I try to say his name as little as possible because there is a respect there...believe it or not." Blake chuckled, knowing himself that it sounded like a strange thing to say given some of his lyrical content. "This is not an "I HATE DUSTYN BLUE" album. I already talk enough about him on the album, or at least the 2012 version of him. At the end of the day, this album is about me and my journey. My truth. My side of the story. Dustyn will certainly have his take on things too, which he is entitled to. I don't want his name to sell the record. That isn't fair on him or on me for all the work I've put into it. I know it's hard to avoid but I do my best to keep his name out of it. This isn't a "FOR DREW" moment but he was pivotal in a huge part of my life and I have every right to share it." I picked up on the Tisha Jackson reference. He wanted to make it clear that this was not an album dedicated to his ex but rather the things he learned while with him. I decided not to push Blake for his opinion on FOR DREW as the album was inspired by the breakup of Tisha Jackson and Drew Westbrook, who had an affair with Deneil Khan. Deneil was engaged to Mandy Williams at the time, Blake's cousin. The entire interview was shaping up to be one big game of six degrees of separation.

Blake seems to be at peace with what happened between himself and Blue. Earlier in our interview he likened this album to a letter you burn after writing, letting the problems go with the embers. I ask him whether or not his ex is on the same wavelength as he is. "I don't think I'm on his Christmas card list. One day I would like to be friends again but I'm not sure how plausible that is. We have history that doesn't deserve to be thrown away. I touch on that on the album. Yeah, we went through hell but it was crucial and formative. It's a bond only we have. I'm not going to turn up at his door with a bunch of flowers and beg for forgiveness and acceptance but I would like if we slowly worked our way back to at least being able to have a conversation longer than 30 seconds without any yelling or glares involved." It's clear that, just like his former band mates, Dustyn will not be picking up a copy of the album. Blake, however, does seem more eager to rekindle things with Blue than with fellow The Zone alumni. There is still a strong emotional connection intact even if it is no longer a romantic one.

This is clearly a frank man and musician. He is willing to tell the world that he was a drug addict. He has no reservations talking about his depression and mental health. Giving a warts and all account of his high profile relationship with one of the biggest stars in the world is clearly not off limits so I'm fascinated to know if his music follows a specific formula. Is there anything off limits? Does he feel obligated to talk about certain subjects? "I basically write for myself but I don't put out anything I don't like. If I think it's good, I'm pretty sure a lot of other people will too." Blake gave a confident shrug and a little scrunch of the nose. "My music is like a diary and therapy session. I write it for my benefit but I also hope the lyrics connect with and help other people too so in a sense, yeah I do write for the fans but I don't over analyse it. I don't look at my project and say "Oh we need one with this sound because it'll sound like The Zone and please old fans" or "Let's get a feature on it to send it up the charts and crossover." I'd drive myself crazy if I did that and I think it sucks the fun as well as the true essence out of art. It can't be calculated."

Blake already had his fair share of hecklers so when it was announced that he was going to release music independently, there was an influx of tweets that branded his as a "failure", "flop" and simply not good enough to be on a major label. The silly connotation of "independent" equalling "cheap and rubbish" cropped up many times too. It didn't help when the first single "Who Do You Love Now?" reached the dizzying heights of #85. I asked Blake how he feels about this ruthless online fan culture. "I am honestly pretty out of the loop. I spent a couple of years just being a total fuck up then I was in therapy followed by all the work for this album. I've been cut off from things. Even when I have the time, social media is a pretty lethal thing so I just make a few posts and go. I'm not really into the drama and pop culture. I've been on the receiving end of all the attention and it's so fucking damaging. I don't want to add to that. I don't want to read shit about me either and fall into that pit. It's not healthy." Blake scowled and looked down at his phone, which looked well loved to say the least. Most of his posts are met with keyboard warriors so I agreed with him that it's best to stay away. He nodded and finished off his coffee before refusing another.