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FemmeCoke
"Yes." Coke says, smiling brightly into the camera, filming in the backseat of a moving car. Followers begin piling up into her Instagram LIVE stream, everyone flooding the comments at once. "I know, I know. I'm shaking a little too, this is crazy! I've been on Twitter twice in one trimester and now I'm on Instagram live, WHAT! Only your girl."
Dozens of comments are stacking up on Coke's live and at the moment a lot of them are mentioning Playboy Magazine.
"We wanna talk about Playboy? Kay." Coke pauses for a second. "You know ever since we did the photoshoot, I can't stop thinking about how Hugh Hefner's balls have got to look like... You know what hash browns look like after you leave them in the gravy for too long? I'm kinda scared, to be honest. Do you girls think Kidd's is gonna look like that when he's older?.......I can't believe I just lost 4000 viewers for asking that. Oh wow. Yikes. Listen girls, this isn't an interview, this is a grown little chit chat. It's a tea party and not the racist kind, hunny! Y'all ever had brunch with the girls? This is that. Let's start over." Coke clears her throat. "Hey girls! Hello! Hold onto your chairs! We got everything, even what no one aaked for! Our specials? Soggy hash browns courtesy of THE Playboy, himself! Bon appetit!"
Just like in any good comment section, after some viewers joke around commenting "bone apple FEET", a bunch of other viewers demand Coke to show her feet. She frowns.
"Don't play with me, do I look like I'm about to show some feet?? I don't play like that. I give us one cute photoshoot and we lose your damn minds? Are all my followers middle-aged heterosexual men? What's going on at instagram.com today?" Coke rolls her eyes and takes a deep breath. "Where are my...--ASK ME TO SHOW FEET ONE MORE DAMN TIME. ONE MORE TIME. I WILL SHUT THIS LIVE DOWN. THIS WILL BE THE LAST TIME YALL SEE ME ON INSTAGRAM." Coke waits patiently before she continues. "Like I was saying, where are all my Aire Force girls at?!"
The comments are taken over by proud fans showing their love.
"Yes. Hey girls. Hello. I just wanted to say I love you but your fellow viewers keep trying me. You better let them know about your girl Coke. I will leave this live and disappear in Thailand for the next 3 months."
Someone in the comments mentions that Thailand is the AID's capital.
"Thailand is the AIDs capital? Girl, stop. We all know that's Atlanta. Filth. Nothing there but sin and struggling reality stars. The entire South is a shithole but Georgia really takes the ca--"
Fans are currently spamming the comments with questions about the tour the singer has been hinting at for months now.
"Now I know we aren't trying to dictate my conversation, I..." Coke scrunches up her face. "Why are we asking about the tour? Beloved...can we even afford the tickets?? We're scared I'm gonna go on the road without telling my audience first?? Stop worrying about the details, just get your money together. My part is taken care of, you need to be harrasing your wallets, not me."
One of the comments that catches Coke's eyes mentions Rum's lack of social media presence in the past few weeks.
"Rum's been quiet? Well duh. She has a man now, she's busy getting dicked down." Coke exhaled deeply, closing her eyes and saying a little prayer under her breath. "Just remembered who's dicking her down. Why would y'all even bring this up?"
When Coke opens her eyes to look at the comments, the first one she sees is someone asking if Rum is quiet because she's pregnant. This really triggers her.
"IS RUM PREGNANT???" She asks the question as if she's offended by it, but at the same time hesitates on the answer. "I didn't even hesitate. I didn't hesitate at all. That shouldn't have even been a damn question. Nina would never let Tyron nut in her!! Are you kidding me? 5 years ago we made a blood pact that we wouldn't let none of these Hollywood men give us any kids. We came out here to be trap stars, not to get trapped! No ma'am! What does Rum look like letting Tyron plant his demon seed?? That's like me showing y'all my feet on INSTAGRAM for FREE. Some imagination you girls have!"
A lot of viewers begin doubting that someone like Rum has kept that promise. Others are asking for feet airtime again. Coke is FLUSTERED.
"You know what? YOU KNOW WHAT? We are being very disrespectful right now! I'm not feeling it! Drop this or I'm shutting down the live! I'm not about to let us play my girl like this!"
But by now, it's too late to turn turn back. Everybody's making dirty jokes and the live has completely gotten out of hand.
"Did...DID SOMEBODY JUST CALL RUM A USED CONDOM OH MY GOD. IM SHUTTING THIS SHIT DOWN NOW. DU-RUM? TRO-LLANI? MAG-NINA??? OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, THIS SHIT IS OVER!
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