OOC: Really good stuff again. I enjoyed it :)

OOC: Thanks guys. Glad you're enjoying it. I've decided now, after having written 6 parts, that it's like a reality show lol

What the hell had she done? In terms of everyone she had ever met, Lauren was the least violent...by a long way. She was so docile that she made the cast of Glee look like a gang of angry anarchists in ski masks. However, there was no getting away from it; Lauren England, the quiet, unassuming lead singer of Big Light Show, had assaulted media sensation Cassie Bitch with a ceramic mug. She had been wound up, yes, certainly. But she knew there was no justification for what she had done. She had been trying to get to her guitarist, Alex Leuiso, after he had repeatedly got at her, and called her a cunt for rejecting the bitch Cassie. But when Cassie walked onto the bus, Lauren saw her chance, and launched the heavy mug, catching the pregnant vocalist in the temple, and sending her sprawling and bleeding to the floor.
She had immediately felt sick.

---

"Consider this your official warning Miss." The policeman's voice was stern, angry, and filled with an aggression which suggested she wasn't the first "out of control" rock star he had ever dealt with. "You're lucky your friend opted not to press charges you know," he continued in the same voice, his unforgiving eyes never moving from Lauren's tear-stained face. She nodded her head through her tears. She was so sorry, and so scared. She hadn't wanted this. "Make sure you keep her under control in future," the cop addressed Anthony Hecox, sat beside Lauren and rubbing her back to comfort her, "if I wasn't in a good mood, she'd be on the next fuckin' plane back to England." This made Lauren cry even harder. She didn't want to lose this chance at making something of her career. Not over something so stupid.

The policeman stood up, a very tall man with thinning red hair swept over to try and conceal the impending baldness. He put his hat on and looked again at the sobbing singer, shaking his head in a way that suggested he didn't care how upset she was. He repeated how lucky she was, before alighting the bus and returning to his patrol car. Lauren sat still until she heard the ignition kick in, and the cop car disappear around the corner. She hadn't expected this. Even when she cried herself to sleep, she had thought it was just a matter between her and Cassie. She didn't think Cassie was the sort of person to go to the police with something like this...Cassie wasn't someone to go to the police with something like this!

Her eyes shot to the other side of the kitchen, where her band mate, Alex Leuiso sat perched on a worktop. He smirked to himself, as he tried to avoid Lauren's accusatory gaze. Her heart filled with hatred, anger, and a deep sense of rejection and deceit. For the first time since the argument two days ago, she talked to another member of Big Light Show.

"You! You did this!" She spat toward Alex, surprised at the venom she could hear in her own voice. "You fucking devious shit! I could have been deported!" She stood up, her fists clenched in a tight ball of muscle and hate. In the corner of her eye, she saw Anthony stand up at the same time, ready to pounce, ready to stop her assaulting someone else. She relaxed her hands, as the bassist's mere presence brought her more to her senses. She sighed, and wiped her face with the palm of her sweating hand. "Why Alex? We're friends!" She looked at him, her eyes burning a deep hole through him, and he sensed her deep rooted feelings for him, hopping down from the worktop, ready to run if this turned out how it did yesterday. As he saw her hands relax, he felt more confident of speaking his mind.

"Why, Lauren? You want to know why? I was scared for my life yesterday! Genuinely! I have never seen that sort of look in the eyes of a human before! You were absolutely crazy. I thought, that if Ant hadn't stopped you, you'd have killed me." He waved his long arms around in an expression of pure exasperation. "I mean, Cassie only came on the bus to ask what was going on, and she ends up with a concussion...she couldn't even get back to her hotel Lauren! She had to sleep in the recording bus! I mean, I phoned the cops because I thought you had to get a fright. I can't be near you if I ever have to see that side of you again." As the realisation of Alex's words sunk into Lauren's mind, she felt her heart sink. This was one of her oldest friends speaking again. And he was scared of her. He was scared of what she could do to him if she was so angry. She had no idea she had lost it to that extent. The urge to defend herself kicked in all of a sudden.

"I....was pushed too far..." she said, without conviction, "when Cassie...when Cassie came on the stage...and...she pulled my hair," but even as she heard her own words, she realised that it was useless. There was no way to defend what she had done. She slumped against the soft black leather of the sofa, and Anthony, who appeared to be oddly mirroring her actions, plopped back onto the sofa beside her, manoeuvring himself so he was sat between the two warring band mates, but happy that they were talking it through. Lauren felt herself resign to the fact that she had been in the wrong. The horrible reality of yesterday flooded into her mind, and she hung her head in shame.

"All Cassie wanted," she heard Alex say, "was to be in the band. I know her methods were extreme, but if she had been allowed to join before she came out here, everything would have been cool." Lauren didn't move her head, she could see everything from here. Alex looked exasperated. He just wanted his band to be a band again He had always been driven, and she didn't doubt that the reason he had taken to Cassie, was because he thought she was the best thing for the band. Tilting her head slightly, she could see Anthony nod his head, ever so slightly, in agreement with Alex. She leaned over and put her head on his shoulder. There were no tears this time, just the realisation from Lauren that she had possibly been very greedy, very self preservative.

"I'm sorry guys," she heard her own voice say, with a sadness and regret lodged deep within. She looked up now with tears in her eyes, but she didn't cry. Anthony was rubbing her shoulder to comfort her, and Alex was standing with his arms outstretched, as if to hug her. He didn't need to speak, his face was apologising for him. He understood what she was going through, but he had been torn by all of this. She stood up slowly and walked to him, pushing herself into his chest, and feeling his long arms wrap around her shoulders, as he patted her back slowly.

"I think you know what we need to do Lauz," Alex said slowly and softly. She nodded her head, feeling comforted that everything was ok, well, within the members of the band anyway. He was right...she knew what she had to do.

---

It was around 10AM when Cassie Bitch heard the studio bus door slide slowly open. She didn't look around, because she was Cassie. What did she care who was there? Then she heard the little English voice, so petite, so unassuming, just like its owner.

"Cassie," came the voice from the doorway, urging her to turn around. Eventually she did. Looking straight into the soul of Lauren England. A burning intensity deep in the eyes of music's premier bitch. Lauren stood almost dumbfounded, half expecting Cassie to attack her. Cassie had a band-aid over the wide gash on her temple, and a sizeable lump where the mug had connected with her skull. At this particular moment, she hated Lauren with an intensity she had previously reserved for only Katie Coyle.

"What?" She spoke at last, spitting words through her hatred. "What the fuck do you want? Come to finish the job have you? That's funny, I don't see any crockery in here!" Cassie turned back to the sofa, folding a pair of jeans as she smiled at her own wit, although hiding this from Lauren.

"No...I didn't, and I wanted to say I'm like really sorry about that." the voice wavered with nerves and fear, and Cassie loved that sweet sound in someone's voice. "I didn't mean it, I wasn't myself," the brunette continued. At this point, Cassie looked on as Alex and Anthony boarded the bus, waving weakly to her and standing against the wall, out of the way.

"I don't want to hear it lil bitch!" Cassie started, ready to burst into a tirade of abuse.

"I want you to join the band!" Lauren interrupted her all of a sudden. The conviction wasn't there in her voice, but hey, who needed the conviction when the words were there? Cassie smiled. Pleased that she had finally bullied Lauren into giving her exactly what she wanted. She slowly walked to the side of the bus where Lauren stood, with a massive smile on her face, looking at the young Brit for the very first time in the eye. She hugged her tightly, and screamed like those happy girls she had seen in the movies. What no one saw though, was her whisper gently into Lauren's ear...

"I still fucking hate you...and I'm going make sure you're out of this band sweetie...."

Ooc: is it wrong to be dissapointed she didnt kill cassie? I felt like that guy from star wars,urging lauren to come to the dark side.

ooc:well not exactly,but death by ceramic mug WOULD be memorable.it has a certain kookiness that i like.

Ooc: Now switching the emphasis to Cassie. This is all still in the past. About two weeks back.







It had been a surreal few days for Cassie Summers. The self professed “bitch”, had spent the best part of a week trying to break her way into Big Light Show, and had thought she was on top. One quick coffee mug to the temple had seen to that theory though. She had the scar on the right side of her head to remind her that Lauren wasn’t going to be as easy a nut to crack as she had previously thought. She wasn’t Harry Potter though, and this scar wouldn’t instantly have people cream their pants whenever they saw her, nor would it warn her when its creator was within striking distance once more. So she endeavoured to hide it with her fringe, afraid of what the world would say. People didn’t really know Cassie. She wasn’t all that she made out she was. She tried to look brash all the time, and she did a decent job of that. But deep down she had insecurities, worries, and the worst weakness of all; a mad love for someone other than herself.

Little did she know just how unlike her public persona she was though. But she was going to find out.

---

Cassie lay on the black leather sofa of the bus, outside San Diego House of Blues. She looked at the expensive white-gold watch on her right wrist and sighed. The rest of Big Light Show were only a few feet away, on their tour bus. She had agreed to stay here, on the mobile recording bus, in order to make the transition easier. Easier for who? She scoffed to herself. She had lain on this sofa all night long, wide awake, heartburn ripping through her chest and throat. “Fuck this baby!” she had thought to herself at various intervals throughout her insomnia filled evening, before caressing her stomach and scolding herself in that same, curious inner monologue. Every time.

What she found most curious of all, was how the inner monologue she had always relied so heavily on, had now become Cassie Bitch. When she first became famous, Cassie Bitch was nothing more than a façade, a mere mask which would pave the way to her fame. Cassie Summers was still her inner monologue then. She had to hide her from the public, but when she was alone, she tried to remain sweet, kind Cassie Summers; the girl who had grown up with a loving family, great friends and happy surroundings.

Now though…well now Cassie Summers was nothing but a feeble memory. She had long since been wrenched out of Cassie’s mind, replaced by the same hateful, vengeful, resentful character which the world loved to hate. She had become a victim…a slave even, of her own vicious creation. It was almost as if the “character” she had planned to use as a tool to fuel her own fame fire, had grown a life of its own and taken over her. Possessed her.

As she thought this to herself. Her big, brown eyes carried down to her own midriff. What would happen with her baby? Was it picking up on all the bad vibes she had sent it? Was she going to cause it to be like “her”, the new “her”, just by being how she was? A jolt in her stomach made her feel as if she was going to be sick, and she rolled onto her side. This normally helped.

There was one person who she could still be Cassie Summers around. That man was, surprisingly, Joey Starzzz. Starzzz himself might also be a complete asshole to the public, but together, both he and Cassie were able to be civil….nice even. Was that the way it was going to have to go? For the sake of her baby, did she have to become Cassie Summers once again? Did she have to ignore all that she had been outwardly for the last year, just to make sure her baby didn’t resent the world like she herself now did?

Then a thought crossed her tired, confused mind. If she did that, her career was over. The world didn’t want to know Cassie Summers. They wanted Cassie Bitch. They wanted Cassie Bitch even more than she did. Cassie had always hated Katie Coyle. This was no secret. She hated Coyle because she grabbed headlines, she made the front covers of magazines, and, most of all, she was essentially everything that Cassie Bitch had been created to achieve, whilst still managing to be nice. All at once, Cassie realised though, that she was more of a freak than Coyle. She was the one who was a performing chimp, leaping through hoops and drinking cups of tea, all to be thrown the proverbial banana of fame and fortune.

“At least Katie Coyle still manages to be herself”. This thought flashed involuntarily through Cassie’s confused head. She tried to shake it out, but it was no use. It was persistent, tapping away at her without relenting, as if it were a leaky tap, audible throughout a house in the middle of the night, and equally impossible to stop. “At least Katie is just genuinely insane….at least she didn’t get engulfed by herself.” The thoughts continued to fire around her head, bouncing against her skull, ricocheting into each other and racing off to another part of her mind to give her a nagging headache that she could not get rid of.

She felt sick again, and looked down at her midriff once more. She was starting to see a slight bump in her stomach now. Not anything that made her look pregnant, but more of a slight incline just where her jeans and her shirt failed to meet. No one else saw it, but she did. She placed her hand softly on this area, and rubbed it with a soothing, gentle touch. Surely her baby wouldn’t turn out….wrong….like her. She traced her finger softly over the “bump”, as she tried to envisage just where the baby lay. She convinced herself that she could feel a head….and then further to the right, a tiny little arm, and a leg. She smiled for a second at this….convincing herself that what she felt was really there. But then Cassie Bitch scolded her in her mind. Told her to grow up! Promptly, another wave of sickness came, and she ran to the small bathroom of the bus.

Reaching the door, she turned the handle but it didn’t open. She knew it was going to be late, as she yanked and yanked hopelessly at the handle. The feeling she was going to be sick was rising from that ever familiar place inside her, and soon there’d be no fighting it. She pulled and pulled at the door, but it wouldn’t budge. Just as she wretched though, and her big brown eyes bugged out, one last tug saw the door fly open. Her head reached the bowl just in time, and she sat down on the floor as she wretched repeatedly into the toilet bowl, feeling like her body was rejecting the last three days worth of food. Her hazel and blonde tinted fringe sat matted to her furiously perspiring forehead, as she breathed quickly, the sickness slowly fading away.

She rubbed her stomach gently again, but Cassie Bitch told her to stop it immediately. And she did. Suddenly she felt resentful that this…this thing inside her, was now controlling her body. Telling her when she had to go to the toilet. Telling her when she had to eat. Telling her what she could and couldn’t consume for the next nine months. Most of all, she hated it for making her want to become Cassie Summers again, for even allowing her to entertain that thought. A bad thought entered her mind. It made her stomach flutter, but it also made Cassie Bitch smile.

She raised her fist high above her head, her other hand still resting on the rim of the toilet, her head still drenched in sweat, and she brought it down hard into her stomach. She punched herself as hard as she humanly could in the stomach. Nowhere near the baby though. She couldn’t do that. Not even the Cassie Bitch part of her brain could make her do that to her own baby. She had punched herself in the stomach, just below her rib cage, almost winding herself in the process. But it was worth it. She felt a lot warmer inside, she felt like she had let go some of the rage and she was now able to relax again.

---

Cassie dried her hair with a coarse towel. She was glad that her bus had a shower. Pregnancy often made her feel bloated, and dirty, and when she was sick she sweated. A lot. She dried her hair, and dropped her towel, pulling some clothes on.

Her jeans definitely felt tighter now. But she hadn’t been eating any more than usual. In fact, she had been eating less, as if to tell the baby, “fuck you, you don’t control me.” The thought of her expanding waistline made her smile softly, and she patted her stomach again, comforting herself.

After the relaxing shower, Cassie decided to check on the one thing which genuinely made her happy. Kamikaze Kate. She really did love her. Kate had come into her life in a strange way: the kiss out of spite at the Chaos Awards after party had been designed to make her angry, not make Cassie feel something for her. Kate was the only person on the planet who made Cassie feel like a girl. A giggly, nervous, but very happy girl. She felt so defenceless in the “relationship”, if that’s what you could call it. But still, she was happy to be involved….delighted even…in any way.

Lifting the lid on her laptop, Cassie typed the words “Kamikaze Kate” into the Google bar on her browser, and waited. The internet here was slow. And then the top hit caused her to exhale sharply. She clicked the news article and watched in horror as it slowly opened up…



She felt it boil up inside her…

To be continued.

Edited by user 27 July 2011 06:28:26(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified

Cassie: I thought you'd see that. What you don't mention is what's over my other shoulder. The parcel full of horse semen I'm going to mail to you. I had your photo there so I could feel how much I hated you when I wrote the letter I put in it! Fuck you!

Ooc: I knew you'd say that lol

Cassie: Alright GayDen (you sound like a homo night club), 2 things; number one: it was up there for two days, then I burnt it, and half my wallpaper. That's how much I hated that damn picture. And 2: why would you tell Joey anything?. I ain't with that guy.

Cassie: Yeah you're right Gayden, I totally love you(!) SARCASM!!! It was there for hatred only. I bet you have a picture of me in your wallet though.
2. I am not a fucking lesbian!!! Why don't people get this? I left Joey for Kamikaze Kate though. She's my girlfriend now. Right?

Cassie: yeah yeah...I can sense sexual tension between people a mile away, you totally wanna bone Cassie, I can tell!
Yeah we are both pregnant! And what? Hormones wise we can just help each other through it. Yeah there might be an angry word sometimes, but there always is with me and my sxcpanda