The Rockstar Test.....Erica Hess v Rory Delaney
Chaos: Who is the most famous person you've had the chance to meet because of your career?Erica: henry kissinger.you know,nixon's vice president? yeah.i met him at this luncheon held at martha's vineyard.i walked up to the front gate and pretended i was the prime minister of japan's daughter. when they said i wasnt on the list,i did the whole. "watch,i'll wave to my daddy and he'll wave back" gag. it works like a charm,try it sometime. so i waved at shinzo,who naturally waved back. bam! i was in. i was stoned as a mother fucker,so i was hungry.i went to the buffet table,stuffing my face with champagne and shrimp puffs. finally,there is just one puff left in the bowl. i look across the bowl,and there is henry kissinger,! looking quite hungry for shrimp.i blow him a kiss and snatch the last shrimp puff from the bowl,then drop it in my bra. daring the old bastard to come get it.can you see that headline? "henry kissinger gropes young girl at party"? henry fumes at me for a few seconds and then gives me THE FINGER! at the after party,i meet henry againa,and we polish off a couple bottles of finlandia. turns out he is a really cool guy....he told me what goes on in area 51,but i am forbidden to speak of it.
Rory: Wow... The most famous person that I've met because of my career has gotta be Izzy Merjos. She's regularly putting out number ones and dominating music right now so I wouldn't be able to say anyone else I've met is bigger than her right now. We've been on tour with her for a while now in the USA. She's a delight and a great laugh.
As much as we love Izzy over here at Chaos Towers, we think even she would be the first to admit that she is about as far from bring a “rock star” as one can be. For that reason, we have to give the first point to the Hess girl. ERICA 1 – RORY 0. Chaos: Have you ever played the “Do you know who I am?” card?Erica: yes,but never successfully...or perhaps the good name of erica hess isnt that great.i tried scamming a whole bunch of stuff from a hello kitty store once. i tell them i am erica hess,and they are like "so,you still need to pay for that 20 dollar plastic purse." sonofbitch. its not like i am going to pay for it after that massive ego blow.i did the walk of shame out of the store.i did get some free tastes of ice cream at the store next door. they called them "free samples".but i know what was up. they didnt want their other customers getting pissed erica hess was getting free spoons of ice cream.
Rory: Nope, most of the time if I said that and told them who I was they'd still have no clue. I like to think of myself more as the guy who's reputation is irrelevant, I tend to get what I want. I'm quite the charmer and I could easily persuade someone to let me have my way. My mum is Italian so I think that's where I get it from. The Italian nation are quite well known for being charming, beautiful and romantic, which I also am.
We were trying to think of any famous Italian rock stars, and we pulled Cristina Scabbia out of the hat. Rory has to get a point, just because she is hot, and neither contestant has successfully managed to tell someone who they are in order to get anything. The shame rock stars....the shame. ERICA 1 – RORY 1. -Chaos: The guitar spin and the knee slide are rather cliched but cool on-stage moves. What's your rockiest on-stage move?Erica: ...um...pass? this is so embarrassing. you ever see me on stage and i look VERY pleased to be there? sometimes i perform with a tiny vibrator...there. i find it really helps with the wiggling and writhing i do on stage.this was started on a bet with nina years ago. she said i couldnt do an entire show like that,and i did! turns out people loved the "new and active erica" stage persona. do i still do it? only my hair dresser knows for sure.
Rory: In our shows we're quite fan-orientated so we do a lot of these on-stage moves to get the fans going. I think the best one is the moshpitting. I always join in with the mosh pits when we're performing. I get jealous watching the crowd moshpit without me because I just love doing it. Though, ever since we started using wireless connector for the instruments, Chris does an insane flip while holding his guitar. It's fucking mental, man.
People who join mosh pits while they are in full flow are actually ace people. Always. As are those who put a vibrator in their foof while they try to sing. It reminded us of Phoenix Nights, and the infamous “love eggs” incident. However, Rory has sung in a mosh pit, and that is the sort of dangerous shit we like to see at Chaos! ERICA 1 – RORY 2. Chaos: Which camp are you in (and explain)? 1. “I should always make time for my fans and autograph signing.” or 2. “I'm a rockstar, it should be a massive moment in someone's life to meet me.” ?Erica: both.veering towards the first camp.i think artists should always be there for their fans,AND make it special.i will sit at a venue until day break just to meet everyone who wants to meet me. we play music,we arent curing cancer. our time isnt too precious to at least spend a few seconds with people who pay their money to see us.i will sign anything and kiss cheeks and babies and hug anyone who wants it. but i honestly hate signing things. it feels creepy and fucking led zeppelin or something. but i make it special so people leave with the feeling "oh my god,i just met erica hess!" and not "oh,yeah i met erica hess after the show.it was cool.i guess." seriously,if i met you once,i remember you always.i am not bullshitting. thats right kenny matthews,i remembered you were getting your tonsils out last month. how'd it go?
Rory: The first one, definitely. Our fans are amazing and I feel like I owe it to them to regularly sign autographs for them and a lot of the time they end up buying me a pint. So I guess it's a win-win for everybody in the end. They get to meet me and I get smashed. Sounds like a fair deal, right?
So the boss (Scott RH) is here at the moment, and he is adamant that camp two is the correct one here. He said that when people meet him it IS one of the biggest moments of their life, and insists that it should always be like that. However, Erica remembered someone was getting their tonsils out. How cool is that? ERICA 2 – RORY 2. Chaos: Where was your first ever show, and was there anything notable about it?Erica: i wish i could say it was in amsterdam at my old dominatrix service....but it wasnt. the harlots first played in nina sangria's back yard in whitechapel. we were TERRIBLE! it was like melt banana getting run over by a dog catcher's truck,commandeered by the dogs! we were playing to about 20 kids from the neighborhood. the old guy next door wasnt having it.probably because were werent butchering classic punk tunes. we were beating the fuck out of them and aiming for penetration,with no lube. he starts hurling bricks at us. i'm not sure what it is with riots,brits and bricks. but it seems when a riot starts,free range bricks start breeding. luckily old man harper was like,a world war one vet or something,so his throwing arm was weak as shit. by the time we started doing " never 'ad nothin" ,he had had it. he fashioned a catapult out of his wheelchair and some surgical tubin. for ammo? his bed pan and about a years worth of colostomy bags. they must have been old,because they were fucking SOLID. one hit chloe and knocked her out and made her smell bad for about a week. this may have been the birth of our abuse of chloe...
Rory: Our first ever show was in Bedford Esquires, we were opening for a band a lot bigger than us at the time. They weren't a famous band though. But, yeah... Our bassist, Lee was absolutely steaming. He was pissed out of his face before the gig and he absolutely fucked up the show for us. We got bottled and boo'd off the stage and we sacked him the day after, which is why we've got the lovely non-alcoholic Zak. It was the worst gig we'd ever played though and it almost made us all just give up on the band. We had to buy George a new bass drum, though. A bottle went through it.
On ANY other day, Rory getting bottled off the stage would have won the point here, but when you play in the home of Jack the Ripper and butcher stuff (pun love!) and then come out smelling of solid piss because you were that bad....well then you edge it! ERICA 3 – RORY 2.Chaos: Was there one moment you can pinpoint where you think “That's what made me want to do this.”?Erica: oh for sure.i was sitting in my aforementioned dominatrix dungeon, casually reading weekly world news and poking a guy with a cattle prod.it seems the bat boy was terrorizing west virginia.again. sure the money was good,but did i really want to be old and grey,still poking men with cattle prods? i guess some people would be into it,but not my usual customers. when cute asian girls becomes cute old asian women....nobody is going to pay top dollar to be dominated by them. i musta dazed off,because the man ended up with third degree burns on his shoulder and the cattle prod's batteries were dead. i knew then what i must do. i had zero musical talent,i couldnt read music,but i didnt want a real job. so, i became a punk rock singer. as a young girl i listened to lots of x ray spex. poly styrene couldnt sing with a damn,but she did it really well.i basically ripped her off and here we are today.
Rory: Winning 'Best New Artist' at the Fans Choice Awards, for sure. That was the moment where we realised "Fuck... People know who we are now." and also we beat Serenity Scott to win that award, which was a personal achievement for me considering how much I despise her. But it was an honour to win the award instead of amazing artists like Isaac Lovelock and Luke Striker.
It's no contest. The guy mentioned winning a Chaos Award. We don't care if he's just sucking up to us. Two points to you good sire! ERICA 3 – RORY 4. Chaos: If you had a free kill card, who would get bumped and why?Erica: hmm lets see, i guess it has to be music related,right?.if i dole out death at the drop of a hat,can i still be considered cute? i am going to say...oh,this is going to be bad. but...suzie stockholm. she was a total bitch to me a couple of weeks ago. the only thing i ever did to her was stand up for my friend. i used to love the woman,and think she was totally boss. but after a few weeks ago? i wish her death in the form of a terrible urinary tract infection that becomes sentient and eats her from the inside out. i know death seems like a pretty drastic step to take,for a relatively minor offense...but i just want people to get along. if they dont want to cooperate with that,then....death from crazy urinary tract infection monsters. wow....that sounds pretty stalin like when i read it back to myself. oh well,i'm cute enough to pull it off.
Rory: Usually, if I were to get a free wack I'd say Justin Bieber, the guy's a cunt and annoys me so much. It's unreal how much success he gets just because he's a pretty face, but then again I could say the same about so many girl bands and boy bands. But, after that whole cut for Bieber fiasco, and I know it was a troll but some of them would have been genuine, I realise that killing Justin Bieber would make me responsible for a mass suicide of teenage girls, so instead I'll say Arnold Schwarzenegger so then I can finally take the crown of being the only human tank.
Cassie has twisted our arm here. She agrees a million per cent with Erica's answer, so we're all square again. ERICA 4 – RORY 4 Chaos: What's the stupidest thing you've ever done on tour?Erica: whew.there are so many.but the one that sticks out in my head is dosing most of an audience with lsd. i had an entire water bottle filled with highly potent,liquid lsd. i uncapped it and hosed like half the venue with acid.being on the stuff myself,this seemed like the most brilliant idea imaginable. i wanted everyone to feel like i did that night,which was fucking awesome. turns out when the world starts melting and people arent expecting it....it isnt fun for them. now factor in everyone in their field of vision is also freaking out. it was like hell bubbled up right in the middle of the venue,there was screaming and gnashing of teeth. security was overwhelmed and eventually said "fuck it" and left. there were people on stage trying to catch the music before it left the speakers.people climbing curtains and people who thought they were on a desert expedition....we are so lucky nobody was hurt...or pressed charges. needless to say,that venue has never invited us back.
Rory: I went out to the mosh pit during a song at the Carnival of Sounds last year and dropped the cordless microphone in the pit. I had to go back up on stage and grab a new microphone but the sound guy at the back forgot to turn the other microphone off. So I ended up doing a collaboration with the people in the crowd who had found my microphone. Safe to say, I wouldn't let them on the album. It was hilarious though.
Jesus....we should have gone to more Harlots shows! ERICA 5 – RORY 4. Chaos: A straight up one this time...number of groupies you've shagged....how many?Erica: oh...natalya is going to divorce me before she even marries me. um,here goes. 423.i know that sounds like a whole lot. but remember, a lot of those were done 2 and 3 at a time. so it really isnt all that much. plus being other girls,it's far less.....vile than a man pounding 423 random girls. girls are just cuter with each other.
Rory: I'm going to be honest, I haven't shagged any groupies. I've been in relationships through out my career and I like to see myself as a loyal boyfriend. I've been asked many times to do it but I wouldn't do something like that while I'm in a relationship.
Scott RH advocates Rory losing a point here. He said his own number totals 629. However, we won't strip Rory of his points...we just have to give this one to Erica. If she was straight, she would be hanging like a wizard's sleeve! ERICA 6 – RORY 4.Chaos: When was the last time you woke up thinking you were going to die?Erica: this actually can be attached to the groupie thing. groupie number 352. amy mcreedy. amy was cute as hell and very....adventurous. we had two shows close together,geographically,and amy stayed with me for like a week. when the week is over,it's time for amy to leave, but she doesnt. she wants one more night with me,not being a total bitch,i agree. we do the show,and that night amy and i.....well,we broke the bed and the wall of the hotel. spent,we fell asleep..or at least i did. i awake to the feeling of amy straddling my chest. i get excited thinking round 23 is about to start.i open my eyes to a revolver barrel between my eyes and a crazed amy sitting on my chest. thank fuck i didnt have a loaded gun in the drawer.she pulled the trigger when i opened my eyes. six times,just to make sure there wasnt any bullets in the cylinder. my life did flash before my eyes,and this was the inspiration for "i never realized how much i masturbated,until my life flashed before my eyes." after i realized i wasnt going to die,i was amazed that when your life flashes before your eyes,it isnt the tv edit version!
Rory: I don't think I've ever really woken up thinking that I'm going to die to be honest. I'm way too optimistic to think such a thing. Usually when I wake up all I think about is breakfast and other reasons why I should get out of bed. Boring, I know. I just don't ever think about death.
No serious hangovers Mr Delaney? Tut tut....the death hangovers are the best. ERICA 7 – RORY 4. Chaos: Have you ever had a moment where you thought “This is smart and not at all dumb/stupid/dangerous;” only to realise moments later that it was?Erica: yup.it was all three. dumb,stupid,and dangerous. i've seen erich hess drive under the influence of hallucinogens more times than i can count.you know that's a lot. i'm asian,and we're all good at math.or so the stereotype goes. so,i tried it once.and only once. i took the usual hess cocktail of mescaline,lsd and dxm. waited until it was peaking hard,then hopped in my car and took off down the road. holy shit, the radio's waves were passing through my body at an alarming rate,the steering wheel had zero affect on where the car went and the road....the road felt like i was driving on bubble wrap.i could hear and feel the pops as i drove on and on through the night. when i finally came down from all this,i was parked in the middle of the nevada test range's craters from operation plowshare. as far as i know,there is still a 71 karmann ghia in the bottom of one of them.i high tailed it out of there before the government goons could come get me. you know how they are. they still have bases in germany and japan,i'd probably be done up as a spy for hirohito.
Rory: Well, I had once arranged a game of football on a road near home. It wasn't a very busy day so we thought it'd be a good idea. To sum it all up I got hit by a car and spent a few days in hospital. Definitely not doing that again, but it seemed decent before the car hit me.
Wait.....did Erica hit Rory? Dun dun dunnnnn! Point each for having quite amazingly opposite answers. ERICA 8 – RORY 5. Chaos: What's more important, the fame, the money, or the adulation from your fans?Erica: ooh,tough question. there isnt a punk rock answer for this . personally,the most important part is the money. i know,it sounds terribly bitchy and rockstarry to say that,but....this is what i do for a job.i happen to do a job i love. i'm also lucky enough to be able to make music OUR way,and get paid for it. but i do this to keep clothes on my back,drugs in my veins and food in my tummy.if i couldnt eke out a living at this,id still be beating businessmen with whips. i dont care what level living i make doing music,just as long as i make it.though,admittedly,i could buy a ferrari and drive it into a pool tonight.i wouldnt be out too much come the next day...i'd get insurance.duh.
Rory: Being brutally honest, the money. I'm not gonna bullshit and say we do this all for the fans. We love making the fans happy but at the end of the day this is our job and we need to make a living from it to survive. The fame and fans come with it but at the end of the day, we treat this like we would any other job.
Another drawn point. Damn you both......give answers that are less opposite AND less the same. ERICA 9 – RORY 6. Chaos: Have you ever had one of those “movie-type” tours where you've had no money and had to fit 18 guys and 6 guitars into a Ford Fiesta for 8 weeks?Erica: 18 guys in a van?! what have you heard about my past? i kid,i kid.the first couple years of the harlots were like this. the harlots tour machine consisted of a fiat panda with a tiny trailer behind it. we took that panda over most of europe and asia. benny,as the fiat was named,gave up the ghost in finland one cold december. we buried benny at sea...or lake. he'd have wanted it that way. when we didnt have enough cash for food or whatever from our shows.um,nina and i did live sex shows to raise the funds. not with random people! we werent whores,but with each other. not to be too depressing,but moans of enjoyment hide crying quite well.
Rory: We've got this shitty 5-seater van, but we knocked down the back three seats and put two back in but further away from each other. We write our music in the van, including guitar tracks and bass tracks so we get the gear out while we're on the road... Well, minus the drums, George has this box-like thing that he uses in the van. But it gets really crowded for the four of us. We had to tell our tour-manager that he couldn't come on tour with us because of this.
Erica....that was more depressing than rock star. Not sure anyone who chooses to drive a Panda can be all that rock either. We had a Fiat Punto once. I wouldn't piss on it now if it was on fire. ERICA 9 – RORY 7. Chaos: What is the craziest substance you have ever ingested, and what happened?Erica: angel dust. holy fucking jebus playing a banjo.it's like every cell in your body has just snorted a kilo of coke,only without the euphoria. take that,stir in a cup of losing all concept of fear. mix in a high pain threshold,now bake for a couple hours and top with a crumbled paranoia.when i came to the next morning,i was in the hospital with both hands and wrists broken. it was certainly a case of "you shoulda seen the other guy.". from the footage from the venue,this guy grabbed my ass as i walked by and i just fucking wailed on him.i didnt stop when my hands broke,or when the wrists gave way. as far as i know,the man involved lost nearly all his teeth,broken nose,broken jaw,cheekbone and collarbone. angel dust,its a helluva drug. this was the last time i did it,it isnt pleasant.dont try it.
Rory: My drink got spiked once while I was out getting pissed with some mates at a local club. Once again I ended up in hospital for alcohol poisoning and other shit and ended up getting stomach pumped. I visit the hospital quite regularly as you can tell. I've never done drugs though, so I can't give you a story about how I got high and the blue sky turned into one massive rainbow coloured sky or anything.
Do we need to say anything about that, other than “wow”? ERICA 10 – RORY 7.Chaos: When was the last time your career made you feel on top of the world?Erica: i am going to go super cheesy here. every time i go on stage and the whole place goes nuts..it's like nothing else. knowing that right now,there is nothing these people want more than to see the harlots. somewhere there is some one seeing us for the first time.some might be seeing us for the last time. it really does make you feel like you got the world on a string,sitting on a rainbow....wait,i think that last sentence is a song....if not,i better write it! thats a great line.
Rory: When Good Morning landed number one in the singles charts. It was such an incredible feeling knowing that at the time, that was the most bought single out there. There were so many artists that we've always loved that were below us in the charts and it was just amazing. That was probably the happiest I've ever been.
The live setting just edges it. Massive congrats for hitting number one though guys! ERICA 11 – RORY 7.Chaos: Have you ever injured yourself on tour?Erica: on purpose? no. the harlots resort to sexual depravity,not gore to pack venues. the worst injury i have suffered in the line of duty was falling into chloe's drumset. i was walking onstage,waving to the crowd and having a grand time. i walked right into the drum set and fell onto the bass drum. i had a bruised tummy and a torn shirt. it was my favorite stage shirt too. it had been worn so many times it was near paper thin and looked great when soaked in sweat. what? it's hot on stage.i sweat. i'm human.
Rory: Yes, this must be one of the most embarrasing things I've ever done. I got tripped up and crushed in the mosh pit at Carnival of Sounds and broke my arm. Someone managed to film it aswell and the LADs put it up on our website. I'd just gone out into the crowd and prepped up the pit, and then once it started someone fell over, so I tripped over him and then I got absolutely trampled on. I managed to finish the song but once again I got taken to the hospital afterwards.
We remember the broken arm thing! And he still played on. Well done sire! ERICA 11 – RORY 8. Chaos: Have any of your fans ever turned out to be immensely crazy?Erica: um...all of them are a bit bonkers. the craziest has to be this one guy,jesse gress. well as life goes sometimes,jesse couldnt take it anymore. so he killed himself by overdosing on sleeping pills. unlike most suicides,jesse left a will. and in said will,he left his final wish to be cremated and his ashes given to jen antonic (our old bass player before karoliena verlinden.) his family agreed to it and jesse's urn accompanied us on many tours.i'd like to tell some tale about how we dared each other to snort his ashes,or mixed it in cool aide and made chloe drink it,but nope. we were respectful of his wish,but eventually gave him back to his parents. it was too weird,none of us had ever met the guy before. as an urn of ashes,he wasnt the best company....soooo,back home he had to go.
Rory: Haha, yes. When I dropped my microphone in the Carnival of Sounds, this woman took it home. I thought this was all fine until George showed me this video of the woman on her bed, completely naked using my microphone to do... Let's say, unspeakable things to herself using my microphone. She was saying that because the microphone had touched my mouth, therefore it was me doing these things to her. I genuinely cried, it was so funny.
You ever read something and think....”yup, that's the oddest answer I'll read” only to be proven wrong? That just happened. How can you beat a dead guy's ashes on tour? Mic-sturbation, that's how! ERICA 11 – RORY 9.Chaos: Do you often get recognized in the street?Erica: never! at least not by people who dont already know me. there was a short time directly after big brother where people would recognize me in the streets...and say very rude things to me.but recently? i'm back to anonymity. which is great,i love being able to by tampons without my cycle being posted in the evening paper.for those inquiring minds...never mind. it's private.
Rory: Back home in the UK, I do get recognized in the street. It's annoying sometimes because I'll be trying to go somewhere and I'll constantly get stopped by people asking if I'm the real Rory Delaney from topLADs, if I can sign an autograph and sometimes I even get asked for a shag, which now I will not say yes to. In the USA though, not so much. I usually get noticed for a while after doing a show there but they forget me eventually.
Rory edges it for the occasional getting noticed. ERICA 11 – RORY 10. Chaos: What do you eat and drink on tour?Erica: i eat pretty damn good on tour. myself,nina,karoliena,and chloe are all rather accomplished cooks. karoliena in particular. she is a classically trained chef. if time allows,she usually whips us up something who's name i cannot pronounce. we usually eat lots of meats....oh grow up! i said "meats",big deal.namely pork and chicken. we stay away from broccoli. nobody wants to have smelly farts on a tourbus. it isnt cute. as far as drinking goes? pretty much anything other than soda. that shit will kill you. for more.....grown up drinks? i'm all about vodka and whisky.not together,silly.
Rory: I love eating and drinking on the tour because when we're in different countries, we try out the local cuisine so we do like to experiment with food and drink while we tour. There's some really interesting foods we've encountered on our journeys. But while we're in the van, we just stick to pizza and alcohol usually.
Very nearly no points to either of you until Rory mentioned pizza and beer. ERICA 11 – RORY 11.Chaos: Any amazing or cool rider demands?Erica: i'm pretty easy going and dont go for that rockstar bullshit...oh wait. yes i do. lets see,the harlots require:
3 slip 'n slides. (1 for use. two for spares)
donny and marie osmond plastic masks.
no collies on premises. (no exceptions)
a five gallon bucket of orange juice. this must be a special orange juice bucket,NOT a re purposed one.
foam rubber Nunchaku (6 pairs. glow in the dark preferred)
morally loose women. (any number is fine. but they MUST be named cindy.if not named cindy,they MUST be morally bankrupt.)
bologna cut into throwing star shape.
a plant named seymour that eats people.
people to feed to above plant.
deflated water balloons. NOT regular balloons.
9 tins of green beans. french cut is fine.
a chimp in a white fedora.
various seasons of mash on dvd.that will not be watched,but we feel better knowing it's there.
chicken pot pie.no chicken,no pie. 8th ounce per person.
a 3 eyed eskimo who knits socks. we wish to have fresh socks after every song.
security guards eqipped with cyanide capsules. we want nobody talking if they are captured.
the sun must make a special appearance at 11:30pm (NO EXCEPTIONS!)
yeah,we're simple like that.
Rory: We always have to have alcohol waiting for us at every gig. We also ask for shit loads of pizza, haha. Apart from that, we don't really ask for too much. If we asked them what we really wanted, we'd just end up getting our shows cancelled. We demand lots at home.
ERICA 13 – RORY 11 – Two points there....nothing more needs saying. Chaos: You must have met some....colourful characters in your career. Who is the worst person you have met, and why?Erica: yikes. worst person i ever met?! i will have to go with Teresa Campbell. I never actually met her,but I did see where she basically told ada Von wannemaker to kill herself. Ada was fresh out of the hospital. it was in culture uncut,so Teresa knew exactly what she was saying. Who would say such a thing to Ada? The woman is the nicest person I have ever met. Clearly a terrible person.
Rory: I'm probably going to get it in the neck for saying this... But my ex-girlfriend, Suzie. She can be a nice person when she wants to and no body is around, but when she has a crowd she loves to make a scene. She practically made me her bitch during the relationship and I just kept coming back for the sex and I was fine with that until it started ruining my relationships with my closest friends and people who I cared about. There was one person who got hurt the most because of my relationship with Suzie and it hurt me knowing that, because I was told not to speak to her and I didn't for a while. I stopped listening to Suzie eventually and spoke to her, which pissed Suzie off and she broke up with me. But all is good now, I don't even talk to Suzie anymore.
Suicide is pretty rock and roll right? No.....but dating and hating a plastic blonde is! ERICA 13 – RORY 12.Chaos: What's the most “rockstar” moment you've ever had?Erica: Probably this one time in Miami. We rented a mansion on star island for this huge party/orgy/recording session. We blew the entire recording budget on cocaine,strippers and rum. Nina and I would fill the belly buttons of the strippers with coke and snort it. We sent Chloe out for paintball guns. (She wrapped a jaguar around a tree in the process and had to walk back.) when she returned, it was harlots vs strippers in an all out dunk and coked up paintball war. We had to break holes through walls in order to have cover fire. Foxholes were dug in the floor,the pool was filled with dirt for a swamp combat/mud wrestling area. It turned out really good. getting shot with a Paintball opened up the opportunity to "come back to life" by kissing or...other,the person who shot you. It was an erotic and drug hazed Valhalla . The next morning,when we woke to the chaos,there was only one thing to do: burn the house down to destroy the damage we did.
Rory: My first ever stage dive, that was fucking insane. I had a 20 quid bet on my head saying that they'd drop me. They didn't though to be fair. I was absolutely hammered on stage and just went crazy. I felt so badass and still do looking back on it. It was amazing.
Jesus....that sounds like a party for...no one. Crazy harlots. Bad harlots! Have a point though. ERICA 14 – RORY 12.CONTINUED IN THE NEXT POST 