One Hour to Midnight
“So, what do you suggest, Ryan? Are you just using this whole situation to keep yourself in a healthy financial state?”
“Don’t be so ridiculous man. You need help and you know you do. The past few months you’ve been fucking around shoving any sort of powder up your nose.” Bit back an increasingly angry Ryan. He knew this early on that this would not only be a pivotal point in his career but also his life. He had always thought of himself as the leader, he took control of all the band interviews and for better or worse, he would never have shied away from any questions regarding the band.
“That’s rich. I mean, since the band took off you’ve been heavy on everything. You’re the one who went to rehab when he was just 20.” Ryan’s constant stare had left him as he began to understand more in his head what was about to happen.
“It’s not right, Josh. It’s not the same as then. Look what I did, I got help, I got out, I can still control myself. You’re becoming dependent on the whole thing. When was the last week you went without using? Have you even given any thought about your girlfriend? You’re going to be a father soon for fuck sake.” He seemed to strike a nerve with Josh who stood up and grabbed Ryan’s shirt before pinning him against the wall.
“Don’t ever talk about my girlfriend or baby again, ever. I would give up the world for them, I would leave this place if I thought that they would have a better life. Everyday I wake up I think about how it might be better for them if I wasn’t around anymore.” Josh was clearly high-as-a-kite and getting emotional in front of the drunk Ryan who never avoided confrontation.
Ryan pushes Josh off of him in and in an attempt to retaliate he pins Josh to the wall. “Don’t you ever say anything like that again. You’re not leaving here and don’t consider doing what I think you are going to do.”
Just at that a tall, skinny tattooed Alex Ward leaves the bathroom and enters the room to join the two friends. Ryan quickly caught on that Alex had been in the bathroom taking a line of cocaine. The past few weeks, even months it has come to Ryan’s attention that Josh and Alex had been living an unhealthy lifestyle. He had tried to stop Alex before but knew it was no use, he just never expected his ‘brother’, Josh to start living the same way.
“What the fuck guys? Would you take a step back and just look at yourselves for one minute. I don’t even know what’s going on anymore.” chirped Ryan. “Nate th-“, “Don’t even bring Nate into this man. He’s gone. He has had enough of the whole thing and I don’t blame him.” Bit back Ryan. He was getting visibly upset at the whole situation. Even Alex had started to catch on to the seriousness of it all. “More for us then, huh? Why do you even care what I do, Ryan? You’ve got the good life remember. You’re the one everyone loves and talks about, the one who gets invited to all the events. We’re just your backing band.” He gets up and walks towards the bathroom pulling out a half empty score bag filled with powder. “The way I see it, you’ve got nothing to lose either way.” He turns around and closes the bathroom door.
Alex turned to Ryan who was standing shaking his head and rubbing his eyes. “Ryan, man I’m sorry.” Ryan nodded and turned to Alex as a gesture of saying thanks. “When did this start, Alex? When did Josh start living like you?” Alex walked forward and sat down beside the standing Ryan. “He hasn’t told you everything.” He glanced back at Ryan who had his full attention, “About a month ago Kate had started experiencing some problems... with the baby. The doctor said everything was fine. The same thing happened last week.” A long pause filled the room as Alex – who had been best friends with Josh for years – took a while to compose himself before continuing. “The doc said there is a good chance the baby won’t make it. He couldn’t take it anymore. Before I knew he had called me up asking to party like old times. I was such an idiot and agreed.” Ryan turns away as he hears the snorts in the bathroom. “He’s been using heavy since.”
The two sat in silence until a stoned Josh left the bathroom and joined them again. None of them knew what to say to each other. Josh had used cocaine as his escape from the problems he was having at home. Ryan glanced down at Josh's phone as it began to ring on the table. He looked up at an unflinching Josh who instead of responding, leant back on his chair. It was Kate calling. After the calling had ringed out it had appeared he had been ignoring Kate's calls. The heavy silence began eating the room as night had started to fall. None of them moved or attempted to turn on a light.
"Is someone going to say anything?" smirked Josh. Nobody responded and he began to laugh. Ryan had seen before firsthand what a cocaine addiction could do to you. In his head he was saying over and over again that it is truly the end of Misery Loves Company for good, even though just 3 weeks ago the band released a statement to say they were taking a short break.
"You guys have got to realize im fine, im absolutely fine." He began tapping a drum beat to a Misery Loves Company song while he smiled looking at Ryan and Alex. "See, I can still do it. I can still be as good as I always was-" Ryan interrupted him, "Does Kate know about this?"
"Know about what? Im sure she does but I feel no obligation to tell her. She doesn't deserve anymore reasons to be mad or annoyed." Josh's emotional state had began taking a swing. All the drugs in his system had been brining mood swings on him all week. His eyes had begun watering up as he started breathing heavily as a way of escaping the tears that had started to drain from his eyes. Ryan and Alex simultaneously dropped their heads to face the ground. None of them had ever seen Josh this way before. He had usually been the quiet, nice and outgoing member of the band. Even during the whole debacle regarding him, Kate and Cassie two years ago, he kept a cool head and in the end it won his the love of his life, Kate.
Josh reached into his pocket as the tears started to surround him. He brought out a small velvet coated box and began staring at it. Ryan looked up and his eyes widened. Josh opened the box to reveal the engagement ring he had bought several weeks ago. "I had been planning to propose to Kate. I wanted to spent the rest of my life with her. I thought I could always protect her. Then things went to shit, with my-" he paused to wipe his eyes, "My baby." He burst out into tears and Alex went over and consoled him.
"You still can do all those things, Josh. This isn't the end of the world, you can still take care of her." Josh shake his head dismissing Ryan. "No, I can't Ryan. I can't." Ryan squinted at him. He now knew that this was larger than what he had thought. it was more than Kate and there unborn baby. "Josh, you can tell us what else is bothering you. We're your best friends man." Ryan walked over beside both of them and closed the engagement ring box, "And no matter what, you're still going to put the ring on Kate's finger because you love her and she loves you."
A now inconsolable Josh put his arms around both Ryan and Alex. Alex had began tearing up too. He knew what else was bothering Josh but he played it down. He never wanted to tell Ryan or anyone for that matter. "I cheated on her, man. I fucking cheated on her." A shocked Ryan stood back and bit his bottom lip as he looked toward Alex who had the put his head down. "I slept with another girl. I was totally wasted when I found out the news about my kid. I walked out the door and went to Alex's apartment." He starts crying harder, "I fucking slept with the first girl who looked at me in New York." Ryan shakes his head and puts his arm around Josh again. "Never worry man, Kate never has to know about that, that's done and over with. Hey, we've all done shitty things." His attempt at bringing Josh around failed when he noticed both Josh and Alex refused to respond to him. He continued to listen to Josh. "Two days ago, that girl called me up and ah, she told me she was pregnant and that she was 99% sure it was my kid." Alex stood up and walked out of the room in shame. He knew he could of stopped that from happening but instead encouraged Josh to sleep with the girl.
There was an elephant in the room as once again they were treated to the longest silence. Seconds felt like minutes, minutes felt like hours. Eventually after what seemed like forever, Alex reappeared in the room clutching his phone. "I called Kate, she's on her way." Ryan nodded but Josh's reaction was a deep contrast. He got up and began shouting at Alex, "Why did you do that? Why did you tell her to come here?" He grabbed Alex but Ryan quickly intervened. "Why are you taking his side, Ryan?"
"I'm taking nobody's side. We just want the best for you."
Josh stood up nodding at them both whilst letting go of Alex. "You're right, you're both right. I've got a family to take care off now. I'm glad she's coming, I need to see her." Relief took over the room as both Ryan and Alex felt like they had won a war. "So she is on her way now?" Alex nodded towards him, "Excellent. I had better clean myself up a bit. I can't have her seeing me in this state." Ryan and Alex both looked at each other and agreed that they should let him take a shower. "You're alright, Josh?" "Yeah, I mean, I think this will be the best way to clear the whole situation up, right? It's finally time to take the initiative and actually help her." He stood up and walked into the bathroom turning on the shower before coming to the edge of the doorway. "Thank you guys for this. I don't know where I would have been without you two. You're more a brother to me than my own." He smiled closing the door after him.
A panda-eyed Kate showed up to the messy apartment. She rushed in and was understandably upset. Ryan sat her down on the sofa to explain what had happened whilst Alex went away to fetch some drinks for them. Kate had begun to cry when she had heard that Josh had started using coke again as a way of running away from his demons. Ryan told her everything - but left out the story about Josh in New York with the other girl, he figured it would be better coming from Josh. Roughly 20 minutes or so had passed and the shower was still running. They had all been aware that he had been in there for a long time. Kate went over to the door and started knocking shouting Josh's name. After she had no response, the other two began getting increasingly worried. Alex and Ryan looked at each other before joining Kate at the door calling out Josh's name to no avail. Something didn't feel right. Josh's words before he got into the shower started playing on their minds. What if that had been the last time they would see their friend alive again?
OOC: Tried to start my first story on here after reading some others. Probably not great, but keeping this to just two parts as I test out the idea. 