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The loudspeakers emit a massive amount of feedback, sending the pub into confusion. Loudspeaker (Kate's voice) : May I have your attention please? Come to the lounge now or you will not survive tonight!
The lounge doors open to show KamiKate and Jimmy Bishop on the stage. Kate is holding a megaphone, connected to speakers around the pub. Kate : No, you should listen to shit like this, for real guys. You are pawns in my game! I dispense lightning from my fingertips! I stick my fingers down your throats! Believe it, fuckaaahs, because it's true! Do you .... think .... that you're UNTOUCHABLE!? Kate picks up her guitar and goes into the first solo of 'Untouchable', jumping up and down. Kate : JUMP MOTHERFUCKAAAHS! See? You did what I said. You're not gonna die, if you follow me, KAMIKAZE-EEE! SAY IT! She holds the microphone out to the crowd, who shout "KAMIKAZE-EEE!" in response. The two of them, Kate on vocals/guitar and Jimmy on vocals/piano, perform 'Untouchable', the anti-Purger song by Moronic Changeling. Kate does some seductive dancing during her act, and finishes on the floor, heavily breathing, with Jimmy on top of her. The crowd are cheering. Kate : Do you .... think .... this is acceptable? I mean like, whoa, paedo moment, he's thirty years older than me and I'm wearing next to nothing. Get the fuck off the stage. She slaps him and he leaves the stage, pretending to hang his head in shame. She stands up and moves on to the next song.
Kate : For my next trick - has anyone ever heard of Aerospliff? The audience cheer loudly. Kate : Well, I've always been a big fan of Zaxl Rose, he's the world's baddest man, he first became popular when I was 12, and I was about to get my second album out. That album's called 'AK-47', anyone got that album - and still listen to it? The crowd is silent, save for one Bristolian voice. Nick : Ooh-arr! Kate : Nickolaaa! Glad you could make it to your own birthday party, and that you listen to my stuff .... you're the world's baddest woman, and I'm the world's baddest girl, so how about you get the fuck out of the audience - let the midget through, guys, she's tiny - and join me on stage! Guys, this is Nick Biggs, and it's her birthday today! As Nick climbs onto the stage and behind the drumkit, the crowd go wild. She starts up the Kamikaze Kate song 'The World's Baddest'. Kate joins in with the guitar and words, which include some nostalgic phrases such as 'moosepiss' and 'don't forget I own you'.
Kate : So, now Nick's here, and so is paedo Jimmy - open the curtain, guys, we need to make my bass CLEAR! This is Somerset, it's her birthday too, she's been doing my bass, and she's fucking awesome. Give her a round of applause! The curtain behind Kate and Nick opens, and Somerset steps out, holding her five-string bass guitar over her head. The audience applaud. Jimmy walks back on stage. Kate : You've already met Jimmy .... but who else wanted the tape off my tits, along with every other man and dyke in the universe? He was trying to take it off with his teeth earlier, meet the replaceable Moronic and shadow of his brother .... Lukey Comatose! Lukey walks on stage to cheers. Jimmy : We're just missing one more. In - not very long, we shall give you - Moronic Changeling!((OOC : Sorry this wasn't very good by KamiKate standards, and yes I know that picture's already been posted. I've got a touch of writer's block.)) Edited by user 03 November 2010 06:50:45(UTC)
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