The Read Hards released a new album this week. It's the first album since Subordinate Flaws. The band themselves had this to say:'

The Bitch: We are all super excited for this album, the title is a tribute to Magazine and Buzzcocks member Howard Devoto! We recorded most o the album in a few weeks in Romania, we started touring the album in Berlin, and it was in Berlin we finished it up and started the "Hopelessly Devoto Tour". We still haven't gotten a response from Howard, hope he's not bummed about it!

Poo Peter: It was during this recording I found out that Mozerella sticks are really kick ass. The Bitch brought a shitload of Mozerella sticks from Canada on tour and I ate so much of them when we recorded the album, my shit was all weird for days!

Gory I. Lids: I was really disappointed in my output on this album :(

Robin Banks: Another badass Read Hards record! What more could a motherfucker ask for?




Some Reviews:

"With great production and prolific songwriting the Read Hards do what they do best, deliver hit after hit! From the sadder "Drowned" to the funnier "Paper Not Plastic", this album has it all", Rolling Stone

"Reviewing a RH album has just become sad. It's like watching South Park. Not because they have the satirical brilliance of South Park to comment on current events, but because every song is like a rip-off of a South Park episode, and the songs are like the Clash without their talent, it's like not they're not even subtly doing it, but showing their un-originality right in our faces and some morons will bloody buy it. The pallet doesn't change if you just change it with a different colour, try harder next time....please", NME

"Somewhat mainstream album, though done "DIY"(the band is not on a label, but still get Major label distribution etc) The title is a reference to Buzzcocks/Magazine legend Howard Devoto and Grease. The album cover looks pretty nice and the photo of Devoto is priceless. The lyrics are quite clever at times and the songs are clever, if you want your music hard hitting and catchy, this is your album!", Pitchfork

And the one the band takes most to heart:

"THe new album fucking sux, the Read hards sold out, they've been selling their fucking asses since COntrol Alt Deafet and now it's the final needle in the coffin! I won't listen too this band again, they can go fuk themselfs! SELLOUTZ", a poster at the Absolute Punk message board.

Mixed critics indeed!

Paper Not Plastic (lyrics by Poo Peter)

Verse 1

Ever since I started recycling
I also started baking and biking
a safe environment is good for your head
even if you living in a fucking shed
Late for my job couldn't do my own work
like in school when my dog used to eat my homework

Chorus

Paper not plastic
it's simply fantastic
I gotta separate my food from my stash
Paper not plastic
I gotta do something drastic
I'm saving the world when I take out the trash

Verse 2

This lady in my neighborhood
always thought you were up to no good
now she's out of work and out of place
sorting her plastic from her general waste
and because of this correlation you back her lifestyle
though you think it's cultural appropriation of your slacker lifestyle

Bridge

I recycle bottles
I recycle glass
I knock myself own my god damn ass
I put my milk carton
where I put my package of cereal
and everything I eat is from recycled material
ah ah

Suns out, Puns out (Lyrics by The Bitch)

Verse 1

Whatever happened to all the fun
we used to have with making puns?
so "Sater and Looner" isn't
more than just a silly spoonerism
but it can still make me giggle
and jelly in a pot still makes me wiggle

Chorus

So play with those words
make them your own
feed them to the birds
and show how you have grown
it's a beautiful day
and the sun's out
so everybody
get your puns out

Verse 2

Whatever happened to the joy
we used to have with our little toy
a little machine that made silly puns
and never made the someone more than once
make dumber jokes than a sixth grader
more calculated than a calculator

Bridge

Baby, you are nuts!
crunchy as they get
I want to smell your butts
so put out your cigarette
baby you're so cool
you're like my biggest fan
you're like swimming pool
where I put my poker hand

Productive and Destructive (Lyrics by Robin Banks)

Verse 1

I sometimes wonder how I'd be
if I were the president
if I could change the world
and if I'd still struggle to pay the rent
and if I were a killer, would I hide the bodies quick?
or would I look like Ben Stiller and be kind of a dick?

Chorus

I'm constructive and seductive
when I sit alone and drink
and productive and destructive
when I sit alone and think

Verse 2

I sometimes think of how life would be
if I did it all differently
would I go to the mountain
or would the mountain come to me?
and if I were an uncle, the time would go fast
I think I'd be drunk all the time, it'd be a blast


If You Loved Me (Lyrics by The Bitch)

Verse 1

The world is so dangerous
and everything is kind of shitty
and they always try to endanger us
into making us feel pretty
the world is a tragic place indeed
and it keeps me up all night
but it's giving all the things I need
to make me feel alright

Chorus

Yes, everything sucks and I could do without it
my tongue becomes stuck even talking about it
yeah, the world really makes me feel shitty and sad
but if you loved me, ah ah, it wouldn't be so bad


Verse 2

Our lives are so terrible
and every man is just a carrot
it's basically unbearable
but I will try to bear it
we live a little then we die
but we're already dead inside
there's no point in sitting around and cry
when I'd rather be alone and hide


Bridge

If you loved me
the world would be a better place
if you loved me
I would even shave my face
if you loved me
I'd smile at least once a day
if you loved me
I'd waste 300 months away


300 Months (lyrics The Bitch)

Verse 1

It's been 300 months since I last drank Pepsi
and haven't had coke for days
I wanted to buy glasses and said "let's see"
but I'e been fucking broke for days
one day an old man says to me
that he would give the rest to me
but he didn't have that much

Chorus

It's been 300 months
and I'm only gonna say this once
that it's never the way you planned it
it's been 300 months
and I'm tired of all you cunts
that will never even understand it

Verse 2

It's been 300 months since I last ate frozen yogurt
and I've been way out of school
I've watch movies with Humphrey Bogart
and Casablanca was pretty cool
what seems like the best to me
is that most movies could mean less to me
I'm so fucking out of touch

Edited by user 11 December 2015 07:40:31(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified