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Offline erich hess  
#61 Posted : 03 November 2012 08:33:51(UTC)
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Nina:right ,love? If they don't show, I will grab four random Canadians and shove them on the rv. We can source our own Canadians.
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones.
Offline erich hess  
#62 Posted : 10 November 2012 04:42:20(UTC)
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Eris- Greek goddess of chaos and strife.
1/13/12
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones.
Offline erich hess  
#63 Posted : 13 November 2012 15:01:54(UTC)
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Title: sisters of eris.
Format: 12" vinyl only
Label: studio60
Genre: punk rock.
rating:5 stars! (it's a girl punk rock group that isnt influenced by no doubt!"

Track listing
1. The ina garten murder conspiracy.
2.touch myself -divinyls cover
3. I love you,mom. But I think you're a second class citizen.
4. Fantastic French falcons frequently fly further from floppy frankenfood.
5. No I will not drive to the second window!
6. Ed McMahon ogled my goodies on star search.
7. Bury me in a hello kitty coffin.
8. You only live once,don't waste it by using the phrase yolo!

overall sound
rip poly.

Review:
The harlots are the female punk rock arm of the Hess collective. Much like their heroes,the ramones, they have no hold ups when it comes to poppy fun. "Sisters of eris." Continues the harlots tradition. The 8 song album clocks in a just over 16 minutes. Luckily,studio60 prices it accordingly. 5.99 gets it shipped to your door.

"Sisters of eris" is rather all over the place. Thus, the title? The release opens with the Ina garten murder conspiracy. A surf inspired tune ala the ventures. Erica states, "I am a huge food network fan..or was before it started sucking. Anyways ,that god damn Ina garten pisses me off. How can anyone be that fucking snobby And condescending? Naturally,I wrote a song about killing her. Of course by using a very "good "gun. If you can't find a good gun,store bought is fine. Ugh."
A great opener for the Album,the upright bass sounds a little odd in a surf setting, but its not totally off putting.

Next is touch myself . The hit of the one hit wonder,the divinyls. Oddly, not sung by Erica. Nina takes over the mic for this one. Instead of the typical sped up and distorted punk rock take on pop tunes, the Harlots slow things way down to a crawl. Nina's sultry,near jazzy vocals make a song about masturbating into something ominous,obsessive, and disturbing.

i love you,mom.... is one of the Harlots' political songs. This one is inspired by the 2012 election and some of the things said about women's rights. " what the fuck? All these politicians have mothers...I hope. How can a person tell their own mother that they don't deserve equal pay? Or that the government has control over their reproductive organs? Heartless motherfuckers." Erica explains. This song is typical punk rock. It can get your dead granny to pogo. Very catchy and slightly abrasive.

Fantastic French falcons frequently fly further from floppy frankenfood. if there is one thing the hess clan does well...aside from general depravity,it's alliteration. the song in question starts at a breakneck pace and continues until it breaks every body part.the lyrics read as single run on sentence,which erica delivers as the personification of attention deficit disorder.good frentic fun.

No I will not drive to the second window! nothing says punk rock like disobeying authority. even if said authority is the manager of a local mcdonalds.i always thought punks didnt frequent mcdonalds or any other fast food establishments. a fun.go-go's flavored song detailing an ill fated trip to micky d's in which some mcnuggets were misplaced.

Ed McMahon ogled my goodies on star search.
ok,the third thing the hess clan does well aside from alliteration and depravity...outdated references nobody cares about.here the harlots channel the spirt of minor threat and toy with a dc hardcore sound. it works well,given erica's.....unique voice. this song will have you smashing shit in your room,cause that's what punks do. besides,your parents will buy you new shit,right?

Bury me in a hello kitty coffin.
ok...this song is weird. it's very very poppy and radio friendly.given erica's recent stint on big brother..and willingness to get naked for the cameras,one must wonder if the harlots are aiming to sell out their punk roots for pop stardom.

You only live once,don't waste it by using the phrase yolo! yes,it's a stupid phrase,anyone using the "word" yolo,needs punched in the face.twice.this song gets my approval.
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones.
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Offline snap_itshannah  
#64 Posted : 14 November 2012 00:45:05(UTC)
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Nichole: I can't stop listening, my dears! I adore this! :)

Castor: Agreed. Beautiful work.
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erich hess on 14/11/2012(UTC)
Offline erich hess  
#65 Posted : 14 November 2012 01:03:27(UTC)
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Erica: awww,thank you so much guys.that means a lot coming from two artists I admire so much. I'd lie if I said you didn't inspire a little extra vocal effort on my part,coleykins.

Nina: castor has to like it,or else. *she laughs*
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones.
Offline snap_itshannah  
#66 Posted : 14 November 2012 03:44:50(UTC)
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Castor: I'd be lying if I said that the Divinyls cover hasn't been running through my head most of the day. ;)
Offline erich hess  
#67 Posted : 14 November 2012 03:49:43(UTC)
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Nina: did you like it,love? Or has it been on your mind because my horrid voice?....or option 3,you like songs about girls boxing the kitten?
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Offline snap_itshannah  
#68 Posted : 14 November 2012 03:55:41(UTC)
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Castor: Option 1 and 3 consecutively, my love.
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erich hess on 14/11/2012(UTC)
Offline erich hess  
#69 Posted : 14 November 2012 04:05:19(UTC)
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Nina: keep it up,love. You just may get a private performance.

Erica: ew. You'll be all naked and stuff.


Nina: love,do we really need to get into what's ew and not ew? Has anyone seen you since you brought Natalya on board?

Erica. *blushes*
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones.
Offline Squeege  
#70 Posted : 14 November 2012 15:20:07(UTC)
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Johnny: Been listening to it while cruising the interstate. Helps the tour go a little more smoothly. Nice goods on tv by the way.
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Ezra "Zeke" James

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erich hess on 14/11/2012(UTC)
Offline erich hess  
#71 Posted : 14 November 2012 15:28:51(UTC)
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erica: thanks mr johnny! it means a lot coming from you. the compliments on the music,not my goodies. *she laughs* though i enjoy compliments on both!
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Offline erich hess  
#72 Posted : 21 June 2013 05:00:27(UTC)
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Band:The harlots
Title: luv ya,but have to kill ya!
Genre:punk rock
Format: mp3 , 12" vinyl.
Label: studio60


1.The church of Latter day taints.
2. Dont be a pawn in The cola proxy war.
3. The decline of western mastication.
4.Kitty song!
5. Upton Sinclair built my hot rod.
6. A lone turtle roars at dawn.
7.Somewhere over the rainbow.

the church of latter day taints.

I'm going to start a church,way up on the hill.
Our altar will be an ass and balls,semen to spill.
Through the nether our prayers will scooch,
Onward and upward, we will find that sacred gooch.

What will we do when we find it?
Buy the mineral rights and mine it.
We're building a town on your ass.
Phillip Seymour Hoffman will be sainted.
Don't drink the water,it's.......tainted!

The church spire raises every morning. It's wooden expanse is never boring.
The holy power shines between the peaks, or if you
Prefer..cheeks.
Make the sign of the cross,break out the ass floss.

What will we do when we find it?
Buy the mineral rights and mine it.
We're building a town on your ass.
Phillip Seymour Hoffman will be sainted.
Don't drink the water,it's.......tainted!

typical dead milkmen style punk rock sound. Fast enough,but very little distortion on the guitar. First track on the record showcases Erica's new style of singing...clearly she has taken lessons from would be pop starlet,Natalya dobros . (Think ai otsuka's actual vocal style) .

don't be a pawn in the cola proxy war!
When I get drafted,I don't want it to be under the red and white stripe.
I don't want to cheap out and be a store brand warrior.
No mello yello ever called me nigger.
I want to live under tang colored skies
When I look to the clock, want it to read country time.
The Mountain Dew militia never rests
In 7 up we trust.
Dr pepper will enlist with unit 731. We all will all fall under his knife.
The Pepsi armada is basking on the horizon,by nightfall they will be here.
Raping and pillaging,like Vikings of a new generation. They set Michael Jackson afire,what chance do we have?
The red bull of Baal will be our savior,liquid cocaine filling our heads.
A tab for a tab makes the whole world blind ....
The cola wars don't decide who is right,only who is left.

very free form sound. Very loud and very distorted guitar work here. Erica shows she can still be as atonal as she always has been. Think melt banana fronted by poly styrene..

the decline of western mastication

Lips are smacking.
Colons are packing.
Chewing is lacking .

The bastions of western culture are falling
The grisly reaper is calling
Will you accept the charges?
Or will you keep eating red meat off barges?

Lips are smacking.
Colons are packing.
Chewing is lacking .

In green pastures cows are cud chewing.
On dinner plates,mastication is eschewing.
The bovine expression of complacency
Is but clouded transparency.
For they are killing us
They are killing us.....
Ass first!

Lips are smacking.
Colons are packing.
Chewing is lacking .

ramones style punk rock. Fast and straightforward..

kitty song
K. I. T. T. Y!
K. I. T. T. Y!
Kitty cat!

Can your kitty come out to play?
No said mamma,not today.
Pretty please with a cherry on top?
That kitty sure looks pretty hot

K. I. T. T. Y!
K. I. T. T. Y!
Kitty cat!

Don't put that kitty cat in bed!
Wake it up so we can get it wet.
We don't need it overheating .
Kitty needs some kissing.

K. I. T. T. Y!
K. I. T. T. Y!
Kitty cat!

I want to hear that kitty cat meow.
Can she lick my finger,is that allowed?
I have lots of toys,but no BALLS of yarn.
But I have a kitty of my own.....

peppy and upbeat. Sung in a very cheerleader/rope skipping chant style. Erica,nina,and Chloe all share vocal duties to enhance the group feeling of it.


upton Sinclair built my hotrod.
Welcome to the jungle,baby!
You gonna driiiiiive!

One day I was rendering some fat,tommy fell in the
Vat and....well,that was that.
I was tired of the fuss,fuck that god damn bus!
What I needed was long and black....
A 59 impala,at got fins like the wing of a bat

i passed the garages of barris and Roth. They are good,but not enough kustom kulture there...
I headed to Chicago,I needed to see upton....Sinclair!
Sure,He is wordy with a pen,but he can really tear your ride down and build it up again.
He may lack the cool of rat fink,
but he is influenced by the stockyards stink.

Upton upton upton Sinclair!
Keep your eyes on my car,
please,don't touch me there!
Thanks to you,my burger doesn't contain hair......
... Well,all that much hair.

psychobilly from the harlots? Yup! Unlike associated act,atomic war bride. There is no fancy finger style leads or kick ass solos. Typical sped up and distorted 12 bar blues sound.

A lone turtle roars at dawn.

The world doesn't end in a bang or a whimper.
We don't fall victim to aids or distemper.
Our bodies will bloat and and float down river.
Collecting in a neat little pile,all thanks to ..... A REPTILE!

He ain't reptar!
He ain't Godzilla!
Not a griffin, a T. rex,or chinchilla!
He's not even a chimaera....
He's GAMERA!

Gamera flys
Gamera bites
Gamera shoots fire
And gamera fights!

Fuck you, jet jaguar,you don't stand a chance.
This cosmic rumble turtle's gonna shit YOUR pants!
Deadly tusks and razor claws,
Shell contains big balls
Tokyo better get out the lube,
It's all going down the tube.
GAMERA!

punk rock sound,starts off fast and only gets faster. Has numerous samples of gamera roaring in the background.

somewhere over the rainbow.

If you don't know this song,shoot yourself...or see the wizard of oz. whichever is easier for you.

surprisingly not a punked up version. Erica delivers an authentic take on this classic song.



Ooc: yeah I was lazy with song descriptions. It's punk rock,they aren't exactly reinventing the wheel or building a better mouse trap.
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones.
thanks 4 users thanked erich hess for this useful post.
RoseJapanFan on 21/06/2013(UTC), kandii on 21/06/2013(UTC), niggajones on 21/06/2013(UTC), snap_itshannah on 21/06/2013(UTC)
Offline RoseJapanFan  
#73 Posted : 21 June 2013 05:25:44(UTC)
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OOC: If this were real, I'd buy this alone just for the Samurai Champloo referenced cover art.
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Isabel-Pixie-Nova-Jennifer Armstrong-Dylan Shaw-Eden Pryce-Taara Jay-Jupiter Jones-Imani
Kato-Eilidh-Nothing But Trouble-Hayden-Serenity Scott-Anaísz-Kimi Kubo


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erich hess on 21/06/2013(UTC)
Offline erich hess  
#74 Posted : 21 June 2013 05:32:42(UTC)
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Ooc: it is my favorite. Erica and miss fuu are rather similar at times.
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Offline genocidal king  
#75 Posted : 21 June 2013 05:36:53(UTC)
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Ooc: Great work. I love the lyrics. Totally love the harlots and how fun they are

Natalya: Oh my....I am blushing at the kitty song. I hope it is not about me...he he he.
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Offline erich hess  
#76 Posted : 21 June 2013 05:58:02(UTC)
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Ooc: thanks! You do not want to know how long it took. Lyrics are so hard for me.

Erica:um.....I know of no other kitties but my own...*giggles madly*

Nina: Erica enjoys this way too much.
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Offline niggajones  
#77 Posted : 21 June 2013 06:07:47(UTC)
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Sam: my neighbors are in for a treat because from now on all they're going to be hearing is me death growling "K-I-T-T-Y - KITTY CAT!!"

ooc: damn i love these lyrics. hilarious as always, mr. hess.
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erich hess on 21/06/2013(UTC)
Offline erich hess  
#78 Posted : 21 June 2013 06:17:01(UTC)
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Ooc:thank you!


Erica: Sam,please send me a video! Name your price,that would be perfection.
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones.
Offline erich hess  
#79 Posted : 14 November 2013 10:54:03(UTC)
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artist: hitomi (aka:erica hess)
title: self title
format: mp3 ,7" single






ice cream baby
sounds like:

Ooeyねばねば、スティッキー甘い。食べるために甘いものをギミ。
それはうだるようだ、私は溶融をクソだと思う! Oooohの、それはとても暑いです!ホットSOOOOOO !

SOOOOOOねだるねだるアイスクリーム!
ねだるねだる肌寒い夢だ!
私はボストンベイクドビーンズをしたくない..
私はちょうどその付箋....アイスクリームが欲しい!
アイスクリーム赤ちゃん。

バニラ、チェリー、イチゴ!気を付けろ、アイスクリームの男はかなり毛深いです!私は彼がリストにある....非常に怖い確信!非常に怖い!

SOOOOOOねだるねだるアイスクリーム!
ねだるねだる肌寒い夢だ!
私はボストンベイクドビーンズをしたくない..
私はちょうどその付箋....アイスクリームが欲しい!
アイスクリーム赤ちゃん。

暑さをしのぐ。私は私の足でそれを感じることができる。このクリーミーコーンはすべて私のゾーンに当たっている。寒冷前線は武に行く牛のおかげで、通って来る!

SOOOOOOねだるねだるアイスクリーム!
ねだるねだる肌寒い夢だ!
私はボストンベイクドビーンズをしたくない..
私はちょうどその付箋....アイスクリームが欲しい!
アイスクリーム赤ちゃん。

SOOOOOOねだるねだるアイスクリーム!
ねだるねだる肌寒い夢だ!
私はボストンベイクドビーンズをしたくない..
私はちょうどその付箋....アイスクリームが欲しい!
アイスクリーム赤ちゃん。





ice cream baby *translation


Ooey gooey,sticky sweet. Gimme something sweet to eat.
It's sweltering,I think I'm fucking melting! Ooooh,it's so hot! Soooooo hot!

Soooooo gimme gimme ice cream!
Gimme gimme that chilly dream!
I don't want Boston baked beans..
I just want that sticky....ice cream!
Ice cream baby baby.

Vanilla,cherry,strawberry! Watch out,the ice cream man is pretty hairy! I am sure he is on a list....very scary! Very scary!

Soooooo gimme gimme ice cream!
Gimme gimme that chilly dream!
I don't want Boston baked beans..
I just want that sticky....ice cream!
Ice cream baby baby.

Beat the heat. I can feel it in my feet. This creamy cone is hitting all my zones. Cold front coming through, thanks to cows that go moo!

Soooooo gimme gimme ice cream!
Gimme gimme that chilly dream!
I don't want Boston baked beans..
I just want that sticky....ice cream!
Ice cream baby baby.

Soooooo gimme gimme ice cream!
Gimme gimme that chilly dream!
I don't want Boston baked beans..
I just want that sticky....ice cream!
Ice cream baby baby.


kicks off with familiar ice cream truck music.this quickly fades into bright and up beat music. The intro is of comfortable length before hitomi starts singing. She cranks up the cuteness to unprecedented levels for the vocal delivery. She also sings for the first time in her native tongue. It's as sticky sweet as the substance that plays so prominent in the song. Aside from the language and innuendo,it almost could be on a kids show. Song centers mainly around the catchy chorus,which is sung as more of a cheer than a song.....complete with hand claps. .

hitomi sez: who doesn't love ice cream? But sometimes it looks a little Pervy when it melts and runs down your hands....maybe this is just me,then? You know what? Sometimes a song about ice cream,is just about ice cream. So there.it was super fun recording this. Especially since I got to vamp it up on some of the more innuendo laden lines. Maybe a video of this is in the works? Maybe not. I'm a lazy little thing.


ibiza
sounds like:

The music's throbbing.
Our heads are bobbing.
We'll be getting on,
Come dawn.
200 bpm.
That's what I need to make me grin.

Dance with me.
Love with me.
We're here all night.
Dance and fuck with might!

Against the bass we swim.
It's useless,we can't win.
May as well dance.
I like your pants.
Shiny like glass.
curvy like your ass.

Dance with me.
Love with me.
We're here all night.
Dance and fuck with might!

They call us trashy.
Too flashy.
Like a couple of cheap whores.
We're gonna hit all the dance floors.
Light it up and ready the drink!
We aren't stopping,till in the bed we sink.

Dance with me.
Love with me.
We're here all night.
Dance and fuck with might!


Very bass heavy and "clubby". This makes for a good contrast to the high pitched and squeaky vocals of eri...hitomi. The vocals here are sassy and have an almost hip hop feel. Like most dance songs,the lyrics aren't really the focus. It's the beat. And the beat is delivered by the spadeful.

hitomi sez: ok. I love Ibiza. I love to go there with my wife,and dance our asses off.also,dressing way sluttier than I EVER would anywhere else. That's ibizas magic...making good girls slutty and making club music listenable. (Chemical help on this does wonders.) I thought "hitomi,your a musican. You could probably make a club banger,as the kids call it." So here is what I came up with. Fuck you if you don't like it.

splash splash!
sounds like:

それは長い日だった。私はあらゆる方法で疲れ。
石鹸その後泡、いくつかの抱擁。
それは私が必要なものです。それは私が必要なものです!

スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュ....ダビングダビングをこする!

ラバーダッキー?この浴槽には、ハローキティではありません!
私は泡の中に隠れて、アットホームな雰囲気。
私はすべての鎖から自由だ....それがドレインダウンするまで。

スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュ....ダビングダビングをこする!

私はペットを得るための暖かく湿った、準備ができています。
いいえ清潔なタオルはありません!しかめっ面で私が叫ぶ。
私はちょうど乾燥滴下しようとするでしょうね。

スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュスプラッシュ
スプラッシュスプラッシュ....ダビングダビングをこする!



splash splash! *translation

It's been a long day. I'm tired in every way.
Soap and bubbles,then some cuddles.
That's what I need. That's what I need!

Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash....rub a dub dub!

Rubber ducky? Not in this tub,it's hello kitty!
I feel at home,hiding among the foam.
I'm free from all chains....until it goes Down the drain.

Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash....rub a dub dub!

I'm warm and wet,ready for get a pet.
No clean towel! I shout with a scowl.
I guess I'll try to just drip dry.

Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash splash splash splash
Splash splash....rub a dub dub!


catchier than Velcro equipped common cold. Starts with a punky guitar sound,would not be out of place on a harlots record. When hitomi does start singing,It's in Japanese and pretty much racing against the guitar. this gives a very fun and carefree feel to the song. The chorus finds the words and music speeding up even more. The song ends abruptly without any fade out. It's of note,after the last word is sung,an exhausted hitomi is heard saying ."whew,fuck!"

hitomi sez: catchy was the name of the game here. I loooove fun music. As if you couldn't tell. So I went down into the lab and concocted this. I wanted something that would stay in people's heads for days at a time. My sound engineer killed himself days after completing this , just to get it off his mind. Success! Actually,I think he was being indicted for something or the other.but I like to think this song helped him pull the trigger. Oh,and don't picture me naked in the tub while you listen to this song.
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thanks 4 users thanked erich hess for this useful post.
RoseJapanFan on 14/11/2013(UTC), Walton on 14/11/2013(UTC), Andre Gandra on 14/11/2013(UTC), snap_itshannah on 14/11/2013(UTC)
Offline RoseJapanFan  
#80 Posted : 14 November 2013 14:06:36(UTC)
RoseJapanFan
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OOC: Awww, these lyrics fit Erica so well :P They are silly and fun, just like her.

Honor: God, you're like the cutest little girl in the world. I would want my babies to look like Erica and not even question why they don't look white. I'm definitely buying this for the weekends when I'm high. Not that this is bad but I'm sure I'll become obsessed when high.
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"My God! We truly are a talented bunch. The fact that we write entire albums all on our own while the biggest stars in the world have 45 co-writers on ONE track?? Where the hell are OUR record deals and GRAMMYS?" -BrownSugar



thanks 1 user thanked RoseJapanFan for this useful post.
erich hess on 14/11/2013(UTC)
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