"I tried that, didn't quite workout so we just used the bottle. I tried to prepare but all of that kind of goes out the window when they arrive." She laughs, remembering her first night with Luca. "It just takes practice and patience." No, well, maybe. I do have a looooot of cousins and nieces and nephews. I feel like its a ritual now, no one just expected it to be me so soon."Sometimes both. I didn't and thank god Luca didn't oh and then there's the afterbirth, yucky. I saved his placenta though, just in case he gets sick and needs it. I suggest it if you talk about that with Ada." She nods, feeling as if she could teach a class with her experience.

Mariko is in her house in Osaka. It's comfortable sort of house, clean,but a little cluttered. She sits on the small couch that faces the large window. She is wearing a teal and white kimono,purposely left loose at the top.

Mariko hears the bell and jumps up. She gives herself a once over in the mirror...she should have put lipstick on. Damn,and her purse was in the bathroom. She sighs and opens the door to greet nina. She throws her arms around her happily. "Nina chan!" She squeals. She sees the SUV and driver over Nina's shoulder. " damn,you are doing well for yourself!" She teases.

Mariko waves to the driver before closing the door. It would be rude not o acknowledge him. " I am still a nobody,so I'm driving myself like a chump." She giggles,happy for nina. " this is my house." She gestures around. " you and aire can stay here for as long as the tour is in Japan. I have to bedrooms, so someone has to sleep with me." She grins at nina. " you must be thirsty. You like a drink?" Mariko felt completely normal around nina. It was like yesterday with vara never happened.but it did.

mariko reaches and holds nina's hand as they venture into the kitchen."no aire,huh? just nina and mariko...i like that." she opens her fridge and looks through it. "ok. we have water, pepsi with cucumber...dont ask,its japan." she giggles. "of if you want something stronger? scotch or sake." mariko winces.her booze selection is horrible.

mariko shakes her head. "nah,im going out on tour soon as jen armstrong gets her act together. the food would just spoil anyway.mariko gets out the sake and the traditonal cups for it and pours them each some. she smiles as nina hops on the counter,it was adorable. she leans against the sink,which is really close to the counter. "no i am not mad at you at all.i love that you are not a twitter girlfriend." its mariko's turn to look down then up at nina. she is sure once she starts telling about the past with vara,the present will come too. she cant lie to nina. she just cant. "you know my friend,vara? you should really know...i have slept with her several times." mariko stops there.not wanting to overwhelm nina.

"yeah.poor thing.she is so so sweet. i went shopping with her once and i think we hit it off." mariko says with a smile. she does like jen,and her life would probably be smoother if she was more like jen...minus the bulimia. mariko winces as nina speaks.she has to tell her,she cant lie to nina. mariko looks around and sees all sorts of things nina could throw at her. she takes a drink and sighs. "it...almost happened yesterday." mariko says softly,she shakes her head.

mariko wraps her arms around herself and jumps as the glass comes down hard. mariko felt like she wanted to melt through the floor. she could have avoided this by just leaving this detail out,but she cared for nina and did not want secrets from her. "i know..nina. i know." she says,blushing out of shame. "it is not an excuse....but between the song about emerald,and you tweeting that you realized you loved her...and not seeing you....i felt you had already left me." mariko says,,finally looking to nina.

mariko puts her head down,but looks up to nina."and i cannot compete with a dead girl who's flaws will dissipate as time goes on." deep down,mariko is very jealous of emerald. "tell me,if emerald was still alive. would you be here with me now?" mariko says quietly. she was careful with her tone as the words themselves sounded very mean. mariko keeps looking at nina. "nina....i care very much for you.i could have easily lied to you about this.we would be sitting on the couch watching shin chan right now. but i did not want a relationship built on lies."

mariko shakes her head. "i didnt mean to put this on you. as for love? not at all. it was purely physical back then. i think she and her boyfriend have an agreement where girls are ok for her...i am not sure.' mariko ends the sentence in almost a whisper. the fact that trent may not know has always wore heavy on her mind. mariko looks out the window at the busy osaka night. " nina...i care that i have..or had a girlfriend." mariko wants to cry,but doesnt. i...want you to be with me. i will tell her over twitter in front of everyone that it cannot continue. please,nina. i will do anything!" mairko pleads.hating be subservient to anyone,but for nina,she would