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Offline Captain Insano  
#1 Posted : 25 July 2010 11:19:38(UTC)
Captain Insano
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Posts: 1,529
Location: Give me more sunliiiiiight!

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Was thanked: 31 time(s) in 23 post(s)
Dear god, the musical equivalent to the Holocaust has returned out of the dark and gloomy winter of Finland with another ten tracks (well nine but one is hidden…you need to find it…or not) of horribly written and offensively played nonsense. The godfathers of retro doom funk grind have been thankfully quiet since however long ago they released their last album (too recently for everyone’s liking). The long drawn out and protracted garbage that was this albums genesis has been put aside and all fear of potential legal action from the "big cry baby Keller" (in Tomi's words) has been conveniently and crudely ignored. As to what's happening on that front, no one is certain, "Keller could be washing the shell grit from it as we speak" grunted Guadelope.

‘We are back scum dogs…you can lick my hairy balls like a dog licks his hairy balls or whatever…you can shoot yourself if you want but first by the album cause it rocks and is shit at the same time. Mostly shit. You get a bag of shit if you buy it. If you don’t then you can use your own shit…or if that’s too gross just scoop up some dog shit in the park somewhere. Don’t try bird shit…it’s just too hard to scoop” blathered main man Tomi Kosari. It’s entitled ‘Dean Keller and his Sandy Vagina’

‘No idea what its about…I wrote it drunk and stoned whilst in the company of goats…I think its about some twat called Dean Keller from some gay soft cock rock band. It was Habib’s idea…I think he once insinuated we can’t read. It’s our heaviest release yet…because the CD case is made out of steel. Cool eh?'

UserPostedImage

Is It Sand or Shell Grit in his Vagina?
Achmed and his Amazing Explosives Packed Vehicle Parked Outside A Jakarta Hotel
Keyboards are Gay…Like Gay People
Whilst You Were Shouting at the Devil, I Fucked Your Mom in the Ass
Hot Beef Injection
Zombie Hitler and the Indecent Exposure Incident in front of a Special Ed School Bus
Habib and His Awful Song Titles
Retro Doom Funk ist Krieg
Jimmy Him is an Embarrassment to Finland
Kamikaze Kate Gave Me AIDS (Acoustic version)


The Infidels!are Tomi, Jenny, Habib, Gaudelope and another person too insignificant to remember their name.

It is out now on the Coolest Label in History, so cool that we can’t mention it’s name anymore but a select few awesome people will know who the label is because quite frankly they awesome chicks which Tomi will marry one day and keep as slaves in the dungeon of his castle dressed as clowns.
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_____________
The Black Gates- Progressive technical metal
The Infidels!- Retro doom funk grindcore
The Graveyard Sluts- dirty, slutty rawwwwk
Psycopathologist- old school death grind

Everyone is entitled to an opinion, it's just that your's is stupid.
User is suspended until 11/08/2288 11:47:34(UTC) Greenleaf  
#2 Posted : 25 July 2010 11:59:44(UTC)
Greenleaf
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Posts: 161

OOC: What in the world lol


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YES I am.......
Offline Laurelles1  
#3 Posted : 25 July 2010 20:04:39(UTC)
Laurelles1
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Man
Location: Floating about on an iceberg somewhere

Thanks: 436 times
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Jason: Epic.
Awards (stroking myself and thinking I'm superior):
@Chaos awards:
Best Band - Mind
Best Album - Shattered Fairytale by Mind
Technical Ecstasy - Jason Smith (x3)
Best Solo Male - Jason Smith
Birdies:
Best Producer - Jason Smith

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User is suspended until 16/05/4760 03:38:29(UTC) stephaniewazhere  
#4 Posted : 25 July 2010 20:11:58(UTC)
stephaniewazhere
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Joined: 21/02/2009(UTC)
Posts: 18,252
United States

Thanks: 6248 times
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Laurelles1 wrote:
Jason: Epic.


You realize he just dissed Jimmy from the Nimrods?......

-Leon
Green Leaf
Offline Laurelles1  
#5 Posted : 25 July 2010 20:16:01(UTC)
Laurelles1
Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Moderators, Registered
Joined: 09/11/2009(UTC)
Posts: 8,329
Man
Location: Floating about on an iceberg somewhere

Thanks: 436 times
Was thanked: 407 time(s) in 288 post(s)
Jason:...Yeah, apart from that bit.
Awards (stroking myself and thinking I'm superior):
@Chaos awards:
Best Band - Mind
Best Album - Shattered Fairytale by Mind
Technical Ecstasy - Jason Smith (x3)
Best Solo Male - Jason Smith
Birdies:
Best Producer - Jason Smith

UserPostedImage
UserPostedImage
Offline Captain Insano  
#6 Posted : 25 July 2010 23:33:20(UTC)
Captain Insano
Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/02/2009(UTC)
Posts: 1,529
Location: Give me more sunliiiiiight!

Thanks: 4 times
Was thanked: 31 time(s) in 23 post(s)
If that psuedo Finn has any testicles, he will take it in good humour as it was meant to be...Finland for life and all that shizzle blah blah

Tomi
The Infidels!
UserPostedImage
_____________
The Black Gates- Progressive technical metal
The Infidels!- Retro doom funk grindcore
The Graveyard Sluts- dirty, slutty rawwwwk
Psycopathologist- old school death grind

Everyone is entitled to an opinion, it's just that your's is stupid.
Offline Ronny Rocken  
#7 Posted : 25 July 2010 23:48:54(UTC)
Ronny Rocken
Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/06/2010(UTC)
Posts: 186

Ronny: If you're from Finland, I expect you to have a good sense of humor. I haven't seen anywhere else where you could buy something like koskenkorva in cans. And I haven't regret something as much as when I didn't buy it. I hope this album will make up for it though.
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