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Read hard		#1 Posted : 21 September 2014 07:47:04(UTC)
Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered Joined: 08/04/2013(UTC) Posts: 372 Thanks: 36 times Was thanked: 303 time(s) in 179 post(s)		The Read hards just finished a new album and have sent it around to various press. It will be out pretty soon! This is looking out to be their best album ever, according to themselves, and an artist have never said that about their new album before!


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Read hard		#2 Posted : 21 September 2014 08:07:40(UTC)
Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered Joined: 08/04/2013(UTC) Posts: 372 Thanks: 36 times Was thanked: 303 time(s) in 179 post(s)		REVIEWS: In a British rock magazine: "The Read hards make another album full of more of the same, stellar production and modern punk rock classics. Fun lyrics and somewhat clever puns. Nothing new here though, but the fans will dig it!" Some American rock magazine: "Unpretentious, unpolitical and uncompromised is how we describe the new Read hards release that might be their best, at least in a while. We understand they have spent some time on it. Some lyrics are a bit off like "American suicidal" and the title track, but all in all this is a pretty good effort, from a decent band!" A Romanian magazine: "Maybe even better than the last one. It's interesting to see these dudes do so well. The best song is probably "A Parking lot, a parking spot". There are so many good songs on here. It kind of continues the pop oriented style they went for in the album's first single "Speedway to the moon" which was quite a hit." Another American rock magazine: "Three chords, crappy high school puns and melodies you will find catchy at first, but will probably never listen to again and ask yourself why you liked it in the first place. Maybe 12 year olds will enjoy this sophomore(as in immature, not their second album, though it sure sounds like it), mediocre record. The production is pretty good and that's maybe the only good thing about this. Who finds this funny or interesting? It's beyond me. There is nothing endearing or thoughtful about this. It's worse than Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus, at least they offer something interesting." Christian music outline "We got sent this lovely album from Europe. It's not the kind of music we usually write about nor it is probably soothing or suitable to our readers, but I find it great that youngsters still have faith in our savior, Jesus Christ. It really makes us happy that so many bands still in spite of living in a world full of wreckage and works of Satan still devote themselves to praising the lords and trying to make every all right even if it's done by making noise. The title of the album is a reference to the Watergate scandal and the late American President Richard Nixon. The song "I'm so happy" is clearly about salvation and happiness found in turning to Christ. Inspiring and incredibly catchy!" Another British music magazine: "A new album by the rockers the Read hards. They continue in the pop punk they've perfected over the years with a few more country-ish songs with banjos and some more hardcore punk-ish. What is maybe the most outrageous about the album is the cover and the song "American suicidal". Suicide is a popular theme nowadays and this song is kind of offensive when it's about someone who seeks a Suicide group to find tips on how to commit suicide. But that's how punk rock is, offensive and topical. I enjoy this!" The review we take most seriously is from the unobjective reviewer on the internet called "RHfannr166779" "This album is awezum and all the songs is great! My fav is prolly "Inside deep throat and tricky Dick", it shows how smart the Read hards ae because they write songs about Dicks and sucking. I listen to this every day on my busride to school, much better than U2 and Arianda Grande. 100/10, such a great album! I love it and u should love it to.

1 user thanked Read hard for this useful post.		erich hess on 21/09/2014(UTC)
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Read hard		#3 Posted : 22 September 2014 01:31:37(UTC)
Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered Joined: 08/04/2013(UTC) Posts: 372 Thanks: 36 times Was thanked: 303 time(s) in 179 post(s)		http://www.therockstarga..._album.asp?AlbumID=24499 The Bitch: This is our new album "Inside Deep throat and tricky Dick". It's finally out, I like the album cover. We all wrote lyrics on the album. Me and Gory switched roles and I wrote a sad, depressing song and he wrote a happy song Gory I. Lids: I had to write a happy song for once. I gotta ground myself a bit. Robin Banks: I played the drums on this album. It was fun. Poo Peter: I really want you guys to like this album, especially the song I wrote! You should buy the vinyl, vinyl is cooler than Cassette tapes. The Bitch also thought the Checkers speech was in 1953, when it really was in 1954.Also he made another pun on "Suicidal" Lyrics: Inside Deep throat and tricky Dick(Lyrics by The Bitch) Verse 1 I remember Richard Nixon on the TV I thought his dog was a vixen little Checkers in '53 He wore sketchy sandals like Jesus or a cat Tricky Dick, the Watergate scandals and those poor democrats Chorus Ah whoah oh Tricky Dick ah whoah oh Tricky Inside deep throat this story makes me sick Verse 2 I remember Linda Lovelace she knew Richard too Deep throat and her face had tricky Dick and goo Into the movies she went and there's no remedy she's down with the Vice President who lost against Kennedy Bridge Inside deep throat and tricky Dick! Speedway to the moon(lyrics by the Bitch) Verse 1 Baby, I'm just confused Maybe I'm not amused you know that I'm all right Uno was out of sight Popsongs can be real fun drop songs to nr one Ass straight from stilettos Castrate and sing falsettos Chorus I'm on a speedway to the moon I'm gonna get there soon I'm on a speedway to the moon Verse 2 Moony worse than earth again Universe not worth a ten the milkeyway is one short ride a silky way to turn the tide violet and daisy aisles bio get the crazy smiles electric shock I'm struck with hate eclectic rock I'll masturbate A tiny little piece of my dart(Lyrics by Robin Banks) Verse 1 I met her in Sea world she was such a good girl we bought french waffles and tea I gave it my best shot but I would've never thought that she'd be girl for me Chorus She took everything, she ruined me but she didn't break my heart she just took and stole a tiny little piece of my dart oh yeah yeah Verse 2 We went to a bar Shot pool and drank Bacardi the bartender would stop and sigh we played dart, she took it that damn dart got crooked right before I was about to hit bulls eye Chorus I was about to throw it but she tore it apart the only thing she got from me was a tiny little piece of my dart American suicide(lyrics by the Bitch) Verse 1 I've been going out of my mind I've been out of options I know I'm alone in the world but it seems like everyone's watching I can't find an outway no damn escape I don't have a decent job I'm not in shape Pre-chorus I'm all out of chances I'm all out of hope I went to the cartel I've started shooting dope Chorus Now I am American suicidal Kurt Cobain is my idol I put my hand on the bible and became American suicidal Verse 2 I got kicked out of high school got fired from my job the only person who loves me in this world is my dog but I know that he won't really last forever and I know his love for me is fake when ever we hang out together Pre chorus I see no future I see no hope I joined a suicide support group to have someone show me the ropes last Chorus: I'm American suicidal Karen Carpenter is my idol I feel like I'll be arrested for libel I'm American suicidal I'm so happy(lyrics by Gory I. Lid) Verse 1 The birds are singing louder now the spring has come to show the skies are so bluer I can see the flowers grow Life was once a tragedy now I smile and laugh a lot I knew things would be Different but this is not what I thought Chorus Cuz I'm so happy So happy I'm very very happy I'm full of dopamine and I feel so mean I'm so very happy Verse 2 If words could only explain just how good I feel inside Because I spent some lonely years and I always tried Life is so much better now things are great today I knew things would be different but not in this way Bridge I read a poem by Edgar Allen Poe I just thought "this is depressing" but I feel happy though I saw a movie it was by Woody Allen I spilt my milk it was 40 gallons oh yeah


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Read hard		#4 Posted : 22 September 2014 02:02:02(UTC)
Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered Joined: 08/04/2013(UTC) Posts: 372 Thanks: 36 times Was thanked: 303 time(s) in 179 post(s)		Penis envy(lyrics by Poo Peter) Verse 1 I never was that well hung I never really felt that young Sigmund Freud and Aqualung were my favorite things I always was quite Jealous towards all the other fellas the media tries to sell us with all its nasty stings Chorus Now I have Penis envy Penis envy I want one as big as you I know you have one bigger than me but I can get a big one too Verse 2 I was watching porn On a Sunday morn some girl was torn by 14 inches but i saw an ad and life didn't seem so bad if I could have one like my dad I'll endure syringes Parking lot, Parking spot(Lyrics by Robin Banks) Verse 1 Hey my name is Robin I climb in my tree I see you in the shopping mall shopping for poetry I see you in the parking lot trying to find the perfect I see you park your hummer it really is a bummer oh oh oh Chorus Parking lot Parking spot in the mall, hanging out Parking lot Parking spot put that Ice cream in your mouth Verse 2 I went to buy strawberry milkshake I think you are full of crap you use the spot of someone with a potential handicap I see you from my hiding place you have a mustache on your face your SUV's a guzzler and your daughter's in this week's Hustler oh oh oh bridge Hanging out at the parking lot looking for the perfect spot Three S's(Lyrics by The Bitch) Verse 1 I woke up in the morning Where was I sailing? I listened to fair warning though I don't like Van Halen I know that I am lame I know that I'm habitual but I am not to blame I gotta do my ritual Chorus I gotta shave shower and shit what would I do without it? I think that's gonna be a hit oh yeah yeah yeah I gotta stand, slumber and sit play with myself in the pit I think it's gonna be a hit oh no no no Verse 2 I go to sleep at midnight got a bright new day ahead don't know what I did right or did wrong before I went to bed no one really messes with a habit freak like you but I got three S's that I've just gotta do Bridge Three S's And a pig and a pie and gentle warm caresses A Tribute(Lyrics by the Bitch) Verse 1 I got hit in the cock by a giant umbrella I got spit in the eye by a lube lacing lad and this morning without a warning might have been the worst I had I read bunch of beat poetry and Shakespeare and Blake my two favorite Williams and Terry Gilliam Monty Python and his snake Chorus This is a tribute to everyone that effected my life This is a tribute to whoever made me get it right Verse 2 I woke up in vomit and dried semen blew my load in my sleep the raindrops and busting cops busted my nuts and said beep I got licked in the face by a bloody dagger I got the Ramones and Rolling stones Paul McCartney and Mick Jagger Bridge(spoken) My hands are cut off by the poisonous society that has lit fire on all my tribal tattoos castrated my little sister and my dog's genitals look like peanut butter terrified of the west the wild wild west of the cowboys and Indians pulp fiction written for morons the working class looks like a pottery barn eyes shut east for Romeo and Juliet the wind blows fast and I'm on the can with my boner Baking Brad(Lyrics by The Bitch) Verse 1¨ One day I said: I wanna bake a bread I wanna put the oven on full heat put on a cooking show and play with the dough baking can be fucking neat Chorus Cuz I am Baking Brad I am Baking Brad I am a baker I am a Quaker and yes I am a dad Verse 2 I walked the kids to school I am no fool I went back to make tons of tiny brownies my face wasn't frowny when I got to make cinnabuns Bridge The real bakers thing that I'm a dick I was dumb to begin it and every minute I bake I'm just in it to get with the chicks


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Read hard		#5 Posted : 24 September 2014 08:31:17(UTC)
Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered Joined: 08/04/2013(UTC) Posts: 372 Thanks: 36 times Was thanked: 303 time(s) in 179 post(s)		The Bitch: Damn, we went from nr 1 in the world to nr 6. Gory I. Lids: Why does that matter when life is a nightmare? Poo Peter: It's not about the record we sell or how we chart, it's about our love for music! Robin Banks: Anyone wanna go out to eat a burger? I'm starvin'


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