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the duke of winchester universal adventure thread
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Tony beckons Chloe over. "Hey babe. We just happened to be talking about you." Jeff nods, "Tony says he wants to marry you." Tony grabs Jeff's bottle of laudanum and breaks it over his head. Although he's bleeding from glass cuts, Jeff only nods. "Worth it." Sam plucks the beginning to 'death metal guys'. "I think that's an appropriate rev song for tonight." |
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chloe looks like someone just farted. "marry me? " she shakes her head. "why would you want to do that?....oh my god,you just want me so you can get united states citizenship! how could you tony?!" she then runs her hand over jeff's bloody head and licks the laudanum off her fingers. "karoliena is always greedy and wont share with me." she explains.
karoliena stops what she is doing. "sam....i am only going to say this once. but if things dont work out with you and nichole.fuck,even if they do. you playing that song makes me...squishy." |
"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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Joined: 08/06/2012(UTC) Posts: 3,401 Thanks: 362 times Was thanked: 739 time(s) in 493 post(s)
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Tony shakes his head vehemently. "I don't want to marry you....unless saying I don't want to marry you will make you mad. I mean, I love you, but why would we need to get married? Jeff is just being a dick." Sam laughs. "I'll keep that in mind. I never knew i had the power to make women......squishy." |
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Moderators, Registered Joined: 09/04/2010(UTC) Posts: 42,819 Location: representing the 954 Thanks: 21858 times Was thanked: 18084 time(s) in 10505 post(s)
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chloe smiles and hugs tony. "marriage is silly.i see no need for it. though if we did,would i have to convert to canadianism? because i dont know if i'm ready for that."
karoliena smiles." you must be doing something right.you got nichole dick whipped. you tamed her right down." karoliena cracks up.the laudanum provides a great mental picture of sam dressed as a lion tamer,cracking a large phallus whip at nichole. she is wearing a big feathery lion's mane. "something about metal guys playing my kind of music...very hot." |
"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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Joined: 08/06/2012(UTC) Posts: 3,401 Thanks: 362 times Was thanked: 739 time(s) in 493 post(s)
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Sam makes a worried face. "Dick whipped? That sounds....unpleasant." Instead of taming Nichole with his dick, Sam has visions of being whipped in the dick. He looks terrified. Tony shakes his head. "Uh, only if you want to live in canada. Don't knock it until you try it - our prime minister is a giant douchebag and yet, nobody cares. Plus, we have like the biggest cannabis culture hub EVER in B.C." |
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karoliena takes some more laudanum. " i guess it depends on which end you're on. i kinda like it in a weird way. being slightly submissive from time to time has it's merits."
chloe's eyes light up and she jumps on tony. wrapping her arms and legs around him. "yes,yes a thousand times yes! i will marry you...providing we live in bc!" she squeals dramatically. |
"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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Joined: 08/06/2012(UTC) Posts: 3,401 Thanks: 362 times Was thanked: 739 time(s) in 493 post(s)
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Tony tries to calm Chloe down. "Uh, okay, I promise that when we get married we'll live in B.C." Jeff takes a hit of laudanum and giggles. "Dude, I totally just got you like, engaged. That's the funniest thing I've ever done to anybody." Sam nods. "I wouldn't know, but, uh, it makes sense. Where are we?" Rob turns around from the drivers seat. "I think we're in Calgary. Wait, there's a park up there - let's just set up in the open and jam for all the Calgarians." |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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chloe jumps up and down. "yay. possible marriage in canada with weed and tony and metal. thanks jeff! you made my life great...but not as great as tony."
karoliena looks out the window." calgary is pretty." she nods. "lets do this! but looks like you boys get to do all the heavy lifting. nina and i are just little girls."
nina picks up a bag of guitar picks,while karoliena grabs A foot long guitar cable.
"chloe,be a dear and unload that head unit. you know,the big one,love!" nina commands. |
"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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The band grudgingly begin to lug their equipment outside as a sizeable crowd forms to gawk at the sideshow. Neil bursts out of the bathroom and runs into the crowd, yelling "GO YALE! BOOLA-BOOLA!" the crowd almost instantaneously disperses. |
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nina and karoliena come out of the rv, carrying the bag of picks and cable. chloe is struggling to carry the amp head.
"i lug all these picks out here,and neil chases everyone away?! " nina throws the picks down laughs.
chloe drops the marshall head on her foot and yells loudly. "that fucking box bit me! owie! my foot!" tubes and shit go everywhere as the head smashes.
nina and karoliena go "oooooohhh" and point like school children.
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"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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Joined: 08/06/2012(UTC) Posts: 3,401 Thanks: 362 times Was thanked: 739 time(s) in 493 post(s)
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Tony runs over and picks up the pieces of the head. "Chloe, are you okay?" Sam shakes his head. "Well shit, that's great. Another piece of equipment busted." |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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chloe breathlessly answers. "yeah,i think i am fine." she takes a step and falls over."shit! no i'm not! this tour fucking sucks! i got my lip busted and i think my foot is broken!"
nina puts her arm around sam."it's ok sammy.i think that one was mine." she whispers. "between you and me love.it wasnt a real marshall. it was a knock off from garshall." |
"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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Sam laughs. "Garshall? Sounds....fancy. We might want to start playing, before they riot." 'they' are perhaps 20 fans who are gathered around, watching the band set up like they're witnessing a 10 car pileup. |
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Moderators, Registered Joined: 09/04/2010(UTC) Posts: 42,819 Location: representing the 954 Thanks: 21858 times Was thanked: 18084 time(s) in 10505 post(s)
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nina snorts with laughter. "fancy for being bought in turkey from a pretty shady looking man. he had all sorts of bloody crazy shit. bender guitars,garshall amps.nicklebag darrel signature guitars... i wanted to buy the the entire shoppe out.i still wish i would have picked up the guitar. the box had a guy with a big ass mustache instead of a goatee."
karoliena waves to the crowd.the laudanum is well past kicking her ass and she is pleased as punch."good evening calgary!" she shouts to the small crowd. they give her the finger. |
"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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Rank: Advanced Member
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Joined: 08/06/2012(UTC) Posts: 3,401 Thanks: 362 times Was thanked: 739 time(s) in 493 post(s)
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The head busted, the band decide to play an acoustic show, which suits them well because Neil is off in the woods trying to communicate with trees. Rob, Tony, Sam and Jeff pick up acoustics. Sam takes the mic. "Uh, hello Calgary. We're Acts of Hate, and these are our friends. Tonight, we're gonna rock you." Tony begins to strum the beginning to "Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight" by Spinal Tap, before Sam kiboshes it. "Nineties songs only, remember." Tony frowns and begins to pluck a somber, acoustic version of 'Christian Woman' by Type O Negative. Sam nods furiously. "YES! ...alright, this is a song dedicated to all the hot catholic schoolgirls out there - Acts of Hate love your hotness but hate your christian-ness!"
a cross upon her bedroom wall from grace she will fall an image burning in her mind and between her thighs
the band kicks it into overtime....as hardcore as they can get playing acoustic guitars. Sam forgets some lyrics, so instead he just grunts in a deep, pete steele-esque voice.
a christian woman will serve or please on her back, or on her knees will she suffer eternally? or internally?
she needs corpus christi corpus christi
from the woods, we can hear Neil screaming along. "CORPUS CHRISTI! BODY OF CHRIST!"
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OOC: I'M HERE! I'M HERE!
Nichole dances around, listening to her boyfriend's band. "Yay!"
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Moderators, Registered Joined: 09/04/2010(UTC) Posts: 42,819 Location: representing the 954 Thanks: 21858 times Was thanked: 18084 time(s) in 10505 post(s)
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ooc:the gang's all here!
karoliena take the mic. "hi,we're most of the harlots. it's so good to see you guys." she says drunkenly. she and nina had been doing jager shots a few minutes before.so that,coupled with the laudanum....yikes.
nina,chloe and karoliena also go acoustic. the perform a brassless,yet pretty good cover of the squirrel nut zippers, "put a lid on it." karoliena covers vocal duties,and even completely hammered she is fantastic. |
"I'm not saying its even a good thing to own a chimpanzee. But that's freedom, folks." Alex Jones. |
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Jason and Matt watched from the wings, wondering how they'd follow it up. "There's no way," figured Matt. "Dude, we have this," reassured Jason. "Don't we, Shaun?" "Da," he replied.
Clark and Jesse went back and forth on their guitars while the harlots played, just wondering how their first Canadian show would work. |
THE DRUMMERS (SOUNDS LIKE: RANCID, SUBLIME, THE TOASTERS) Matt Holland (Vocals/Trumpet) Jesse Dubinsky (Lead/Rhythm Guitar) Clark Maxwell (Lead/Rhythm Guitar) Jason Engarde (Keytar/Piano) Brandon Johnson (Bass) Shaun Olsen (Drums) |
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Joined: 01/10/2012(UTC) Posts: 18,715 Thanks: 7755 times Was thanked: 6357 time(s) in 2889 post(s)
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OOC:
Nichole leans over to Sam. "So... Nineties theme, I'm assuming?" She asks, trying to think of a good set list to make up.
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Joined: 08/06/2012(UTC) Posts: 3,401 Thanks: 362 times Was thanked: 739 time(s) in 493 post(s)
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Sam nods. "Yep. The only rule is no 'Shiny Happy People'" Tony begins to play the opening guitar lick to Beck's "Loser". Not knowing the lyrics, Sam let's Jeff ramble mindlessly into the mic for the song. |
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