(OOC: Not completely done with this. Still a work in progress. :) )

Edited by user 19 January 2014 10:34:07(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified

OOC: Looks good so far :)

OOC: LOVE the lyrics. Well, I don't have a clue what the first verse said, but the rest was great! Great job :)

karoliena:nothing short of amazing! on paper,i should dislike the woman,but i cannot.seeing her artistic output? i cannot help but love her!

erich:if i can be egotistical for a minute.i want to think this song is about us.i think ada von wannemaker is well on her way to being a force to be reckoned with.


occ:and yes,the lyrics are amazing.i'm quite jealous.

karoliena:never,my dear. i'd go shoe shopping with you in an instant! and no,that isnt a ploy to stab you with a stiletto heel.*giggles*



erich:you make me blush,miss wannemaker.usually i am too manly for such things,but.....

karoliena:erich,manly?! that's a laugh. we all know about your collection of pressed flowers.

Ada: Danke, my dear! :) That means a lot coming from you.

OOC: Perfect. :) thank you!

Ada: Thank you so much, liebling. That means so much coming from you!

Ada: Perfekt Deutsch, Herr Talley! Hehehehe, I know that my last name is an absolute mouthful. Sometimes I think about going by Ada Hess. :) thank you very much, Herr.

Dear fans, family, friends, and anybody who has stumbled upon my website (by the way, if you have: Welcome! I love you!),

It is Day Three on tour, I have been thinking about a lot (mostly while I'm standing backstage, drunk as all hell, waiting to go on).

Mostly I have been thinking about the future. I am 22. I am no spring chicken, as you would say... So I have composed a letter to my future child, and I would like to share to all with you:

Dear Future Child,

Growing up, I never thought about having you. In fact, I never thought about any of the things little girls aften dream about: weddings, husbands, or making babies. And here I am, at the newly tender age of twenty-two, married (weird), to a husband who is also hopefully your father (weirder), and thinking about having children (super fucking weird). I do not know if this is what they mean when they say your biological clock starts "ticking," but is started happening sometime late last year, and my usual reaction to seeing babies went from "ugh" to "awww" to "I WANT ONE RAWR!" Also, my friend, Nichole, is having a baby, and I saw that even though it looks incredibly hard, it looked doable, and the rewards outweighed the hardships.

My various reasons for wanting you are perverse. One being that I want to see what a kid that my husband, who is utterly handsome looking, and I, who am weird looking, will look like. We are a petri dish of bizarre genes, and right now we can safely assume that you will have flat feet, dimples, and a distinct nose, as those are the only physical traits that Erich and I share. I also think that your father and I like each other a whole lot, and we have lots of love to give to any little potato that we pop out, and you will be a goofy little fucker who will sing weird songs, and have a sick sense of human, even though you will probably end up hating us, because we are both so annoying to probably everyone, but each other.

I want you to be a boy because girls scare the shit out of me. They say that you get tenfold of what you were like when you were a kid, and that means I will spawn the devil in female form. With a boy, you basically just have to teach him to not get girls pregnant and stay out of jail. With girls, it's constantly worrying about her being raped, or taken advantage of non-stop until you die. Plus, a teenage girl is probably the worst thing in the entire world. They are, to use the polite term, "fucking cunts" to their mothers. I would rather have a kid with an Oedipal complex than an Elektra complex (although I would prefer you have neither).

(Please note: I have met a bunch of lovely teenage girls in my life as well, and I certainly hope, if you are indeed a girl, that you are one of them.)

Why do I keeping thinking about having children, and not shut the fuck up and poop one out already?

Timing. Professionally, I am not in a place in my "career" where I can take the time off to have you. I am not making enough money to justify paying someone else to raise you, and I am also not ready to give up what I am doing to raise an infant. When I was super frustrated a few months ago with my professional life, I said to your father, "Fuck it, let us get to baby making," and I was ready to quit music and be a stay-at-home mom, so we went on a last hurrah, a lexurious vaction to Canada, which may not sound that great, but totally was. Somewhere on that trip, I realized there was no way I could be a parent right then. I would end up resenting the child and for the rest of my life, regret that I didn't follow through with my passions. So we put it on hold.

The same way I do not get jealous of supermodels' looks and body types, but rather their ability to buy prime real estate at the age of seventeen, I find myself getting jealous of other female musicians' success, not because of the money and fame that they aquire (although the comfort of money is nice), but rather that they are granted the luxury of taking the time to have children and move their lives forward in a natural progression, while I am caught in a perpetual stasis. Female singers my age and younger are all popping them out, and at some point, I am going to be at a crossroads. This is a classic "have your cake and eat it, too" scenario, and although that rarely works out, cake is delicious.

I also made the horrible mistake of entering into an industry that is looks based, and I just got in waht is probably the best shape of my life. The idea of that all going away makes me sad, and I think it is horrible that I even have to think that way. But I am pretty sure I am going to be one of those ladies that is going to go on a nine-month eating parade (which I am very much looking forward to), and gain a ton of weight, and to get back into fighting shape... well... that is going to take awhile.

Also, when people in the music business find out that I am married, they always ask, "Are you planning on having children?" and I know that question is a test. No one wants to invest in a person that is going to bow out at any moment and possibly forever. I get that. In this industry, babies have been nicknamed "band killers." Funnily enough, my mother used to tell me that she did not get into medical school in the 70's because they asked her if she wanted to have children, and she said, "yes," and they basically told her, "Thanks, see you later." That might be true. It might also have been because she was fucking crazy, but that has always stuck with me.

And lastily, I am petrified to raise a child in this era. Whenever I see teens on the television, they are so monotone and lifeless and uninspired that it scares me. Every one of them sounds like they are reading badly written lines from that MTV show NEXT. And even when they are excited, it sounds like a valley girl on quaaludes, with no inflection or personality. The idea of spawning something like that makes me physically ill. They all have their heads in their iPhone and iPads, and their sense of entitlement is insane. I will gladly admit that when I grew up, I was spoiled as shit, but to think it has gotten even worse blows me away. I have to pretend to think that we will raise you differently, and you will not turn out like that, but I think that is pompous to assume. Who knows? After all, we do live in New York City, the home of the valley girl and undeserved socialites.

So I do not know why, after all that, I still want kids, or when I will have you. And even if you do wind up being a total fucking asshole, we will be happy that you are healthy and do not hurt or kill anyone. And if that is the best that I can hope for, that I do not create a human being that kills other home beings, why even bother? So when you end up Googling (or whatever they call it at that point) your parents (probably when you are at the age of two), and wind up reading this on whatever future computer bleep-bloop device via your mind implant, remeber that we love you, and please do not kill anyone.

Love, your future mother,

Ada

PS: I feel inclined to add a disclaimer that I am in fact not pregnant, nore am I trying to get pregnant, as anyimte I mention the word baby, everyone automatically assumes I am with child. Sorry, Grandfather...